My boys are playing youth football, so yesterday was their first round of games. I've also been under the weather this week, so it's quick picks today. I'll add more comments after the games. I need to do much better than last week, where my picks looked like something you'd see from the "experts" at ESPN.
Pittsburgh over Cincinnati
Roethisburger and company will bounce back big, and they own the Bengals.
Bengals 23, Steelers 20—Troy or not, there's no excuse for choking this game up.
Detroit over Washington
Washington barely beat the Rams at home, so I see Detroit playing big at home and winning today.
Lions 19, Skins 14—Jim Zorn's job is officially in danger as of today.
St. Louis over Green Bay
Same goes for the Rams; they played well enough to win last week, and I think the Packers will take them too lightly.
Packers 36, Rams 17—another hard-fought effort on the part of the Rams, but their secondary got torched for too many long plays, and their offense just doesn't have enough play makers. Patience is a virtue, Rams fans; we're building for 2011.
Minnesota over San Francisco
Favre and Peterson will be geeked up for the Vikes' home opener.
Vikings 27, 49ers 24—This is exactly why we needed Brett Favre; there's no way that T-Jack or Sage-Ro takes them on that last drive or makes that last pass. Niners are for real, folks, and they're going to win the NFC West.
New England over Atlanta
If the Pats lose at home to a dome team, you can scratch them off this season. I'm picking them because Brady and Belichick have always won when their backs are against the wall.
Patriots 26, Falcons 10—Reports of the Patriots' death have been greatly exaggerated.
NY Jets over Tennessee
Rex Ryan has given this team a whole new (and nasty) attitude.
Jets 24, Titans 17—What the heck is wrong with Tennessee? I would say QB, but their defense isn't getting it done...no Albert Haynesworth, perhaps?
Philadelphia over Kansas City
No McNabb? Vick's role unknown? Defensive questions? Doesn't matter when playing the woeful Chefs.
Eagles 34, Chefs 14—no, that's not a typo. Until they win, they are a ragtag band of former sous-chefs led by perky, plucky Rachel Ray.
NY Giants over Tampa Bay
Tampa's probably regretting firing Jon Gruden right now, dontcha think?
Giants 24, Bucs 0—Again, will someone explain to me why Superbowl winning coach Jon Gruden was fired so they could hire someone almost eight years younger than Brett Favre to coach this woeful bunch? Can the Chefs or the Lambs get this bunch on their schedule?
Baltimore over Cleveland
The Ravens look better and better each week.
Ravens 34, Browns 3—especially when they play a team as bad as the Browns.
Houston over Jacksonville
Matt Schaub just looked cosmic last week.
Jags 31, Texans 24—Wait a minute...Jax coughs up a hairball at home last week, while Houston outscores Tennessee in Nashville, then this? Sometime the NFL just doesn't make sense.
Chicago over Seattle
Without Matt Hasslebeck, Seattle's not much better than St. Louis.
Bears 25, Seahawks 19
New Orleans over Buffalo
The Saints are scoring like a tween geek playing Madden NFL.
Saints 27, Bills 7
Denver over Oakland
Don't know how they're doing it, but the Broncos are winning somehow.
Broncos 23, Raiders 3
San Diego over Miami
This is purely about home field.
Chargers 23, Dolphins 13
Indianapolis over Arizona
Don't pick against my man crush.
Colts 31, Cardinals 10
Dallas over Carolina
Anyone looking for a defensive coordinator? John Fox should be available by the end of the season.
Cowboys 21, Panthers 7
This week: 13-3
Last week: 8-8
This season: 34-14 (.708)
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
NFL Picks: Week Two
Week one was pretty good, although I felt like the fluke ending of Denver-Cincy and Arizona's receivers baffling inability to catch wide-open screen passes kept me from the 15-1 start I deserved. Week two is always tricky—we never know if week one was what to expect this season, overplaying (Kansas City) or slow start (Arizona). I feel confident about these picks, so it's probably feast or famine.
Update: Uhh, how can I describe my picks this Sunday? It was like when Andy Dufresne first met the "sisters" in the laundry at Shawshank State Penitentiary.
Carolina at Atlanta
These are two teams going in different directions. Atlanta has a great young quarterback, and up-and-coming coach and all kinds of good buzz. Carolina has a washed-up quarterback, a coach probably on the firing line and nothing but bad vibes.
Falcons 24, Panthers 13 (ATL 28, CAR 20)
Delhomme had a better week, but Atlanta is the top of that division now.
Minnesota at Detroit
Here’s the difference Brett Favre makes for Vikings fans—last year, we wondered if our quarterback was the reason we would lose the game. Now we know that Favre could, if needed, win a close game. With Peterson, Taylor and Harvin running the ball, the Vikes offense could be as effective as their defense.
Vikings 31, Lions 17 (MIN 27, DET 13)
Brett Favre had a QB rating of 115 this week. Suck it, monkeys!
Cincinnati at Green Bay
The Bengals need a hug after coughing up that game to Denver last week. You don’t need to travel to Lambeau Field after that kind of a loss.
Packers 35, Bengals 9 (CIN 31, GB 24)
Wait, I thought Aaron Rodgers was the football Jesus!
Houston at Tennessee
I would like it if someone could explain why Houston got an expansion franchise after the good team moved to Tennessee.
Titans 23, Texans 10 (HOU 34, TEN 31)
Would someone like to explain the mysterious disappearance of the Tennessee defense? Give credit to Houston QB Matt Schaub for a great game.
Oakland at Kansas City
Both of these teams played much better than anyone expected, but Baltimore is really good, and San Diego is overrated, so I’m going with the Chefs at home.
Chiefs 17, Raiders 14 (OAK 13, KC 10)
Note to self: Don't pick KC again.
New England at NY Jets
Why oh why do teams taunt the Patriots and make bold claims about imminent victory? You don’t poke a hungry bear with a stick…duh!
Patriots 38, Jets 20 (NYJ 16, NE 9)
Tom Brady is not 100% after knee surgery, just as Tiger Woods wasn't. It takes two years for the knee to be completely healthy. I'll call it now--Pats don't make the playoffs this year.
New Orleans at Philadelphia
With a healthy McNabb, this is a shootout. With Kevin Kolb making his first pro start and 83-year-old Jeff Garcia backing him up, I’m going with the New Orleans scoring machine.
Saints 30, Eagles 21 (NO 48, PHI 22)
No one in the league wants to try to defend against this Saints offense. Just terrifying.
St. Louis at Washington
I remember when the Rams were really, really good. That was awesome. This is not.
Skins 27, Rams 6 (WAS 9, STL 7)
Rams played hard again, but they just don't have enough playmakers. And Donnie Avery must coat his hands and arms with Crisco.
Arizona at Jacksonville
Kurt Warner wasn’t great last week, but he wasn’t helped by receivers who couldn’t catch water with a bucket. I don’t see them faring much better traveling to the East Coast to play a defensively tough Jags squad.
Jaguars 21, Cardinals 14 (ARZ 31, JAX 17)
Yeah, Kurt Warner's a hall of famer, and the Jags are D-O-N-E.
Seattle at San Francisco
After the beating they put on the Rams, I’m going to stick with Seattle until San Fran shows me something more consistent.
Seahawks 26, 49ers 19 (SF 23, SEA 10)
Okay, they showed me. The Vikings are in for a tough home opener next week. Hasslebeck's hurt again, so goodbye, Seattle.
Tampa Bay at Buffalo
Just for the sake of karma, Buffalo deserves this one.
Bills 24, Bucs 17 (BUF 33, TB 20)
Karma says, "Okay."
Pittsburgh at Chicago
No Polamalu is still better than no Urlacher.
Steelers 33, Bears 17 (CHI 17, PIT 14)
Jeff Reed misses two field goals? Am I cursed this week?
Cleveland at Denver
I think Cleveland’s better than Denver, but I also think Mile High is a huge home field advantage.
Broncos 16, Browns 12 (DEN 27, CLE 6)
Maybe Denver's better than we thought. Let's see them against a top team first.
Baltimore at San Diego
Folks, the Baltimore Ravens are for real this year. I currently have them ranked fourth in the AFC after Pittsburgh, Indy and New England. All the idiots drinking the “Chargers in the Superbowl” Kool-Aid need to remember three things: 1) LaDanian Tomlinson is over the hill; 2) Norv Turner is an idiot; 3) Phillip Rivers is a douche.
Ravens 38, Chargers 17 (BAL 31, SD 26)
Home field was good for an extra score for SD.
NY Giants at Dallas
I don’t usually do this, but SportsCenter tonight pointed out that the Giants are injured, Eli’s never won in Dallas, and Tony Romo is 4-0 over New York at home. I’ll give this one a shot, just once.
Cowboys 27, Giants 20 (NYG 33, DAL 31)
Eli Manning is one cool customer, and this is the last time I listen to ESPN.
Indianapolis at Miami
Hate the Anthony Gonzalez injury, but hey, it’s Indy. I don’t pick against my man crush.
Colts 20, Dolphins 13 (IND 27, MIA 23)
I think the defense is still taking IV fluids, though
This week: 8-8
Last week: 13-3
Season: 21-11 (.656)
Update: Uhh, how can I describe my picks this Sunday? It was like when Andy Dufresne first met the "sisters" in the laundry at Shawshank State Penitentiary.
Carolina at Atlanta
These are two teams going in different directions. Atlanta has a great young quarterback, and up-and-coming coach and all kinds of good buzz. Carolina has a washed-up quarterback, a coach probably on the firing line and nothing but bad vibes.
Falcons 24, Panthers 13 (ATL 28, CAR 20)
Delhomme had a better week, but Atlanta is the top of that division now.
Minnesota at Detroit
Here’s the difference Brett Favre makes for Vikings fans—last year, we wondered if our quarterback was the reason we would lose the game. Now we know that Favre could, if needed, win a close game. With Peterson, Taylor and Harvin running the ball, the Vikes offense could be as effective as their defense.
Vikings 31, Lions 17 (MIN 27, DET 13)
Brett Favre had a QB rating of 115 this week. Suck it, monkeys!
Cincinnati at Green Bay
The Bengals need a hug after coughing up that game to Denver last week. You don’t need to travel to Lambeau Field after that kind of a loss.
Packers 35, Bengals 9 (CIN 31, GB 24)
Wait, I thought Aaron Rodgers was the football Jesus!
Houston at Tennessee
I would like it if someone could explain why Houston got an expansion franchise after the good team moved to Tennessee.
Titans 23, Texans 10 (HOU 34, TEN 31)
Would someone like to explain the mysterious disappearance of the Tennessee defense? Give credit to Houston QB Matt Schaub for a great game.
Oakland at Kansas City
Both of these teams played much better than anyone expected, but Baltimore is really good, and San Diego is overrated, so I’m going with the Chefs at home.
Chiefs 17, Raiders 14 (OAK 13, KC 10)
Note to self: Don't pick KC again.
New England at NY Jets
Why oh why do teams taunt the Patriots and make bold claims about imminent victory? You don’t poke a hungry bear with a stick…duh!
Patriots 38, Jets 20 (NYJ 16, NE 9)
Tom Brady is not 100% after knee surgery, just as Tiger Woods wasn't. It takes two years for the knee to be completely healthy. I'll call it now--Pats don't make the playoffs this year.
New Orleans at Philadelphia
With a healthy McNabb, this is a shootout. With Kevin Kolb making his first pro start and 83-year-old Jeff Garcia backing him up, I’m going with the New Orleans scoring machine.
Saints 30, Eagles 21 (NO 48, PHI 22)
No one in the league wants to try to defend against this Saints offense. Just terrifying.
St. Louis at Washington
I remember when the Rams were really, really good. That was awesome. This is not.
Skins 27, Rams 6 (WAS 9, STL 7)
Rams played hard again, but they just don't have enough playmakers. And Donnie Avery must coat his hands and arms with Crisco.
Arizona at Jacksonville
Kurt Warner wasn’t great last week, but he wasn’t helped by receivers who couldn’t catch water with a bucket. I don’t see them faring much better traveling to the East Coast to play a defensively tough Jags squad.
Jaguars 21, Cardinals 14 (ARZ 31, JAX 17)
Yeah, Kurt Warner's a hall of famer, and the Jags are D-O-N-E.
Seattle at San Francisco
After the beating they put on the Rams, I’m going to stick with Seattle until San Fran shows me something more consistent.
Seahawks 26, 49ers 19 (SF 23, SEA 10)
Okay, they showed me. The Vikings are in for a tough home opener next week. Hasslebeck's hurt again, so goodbye, Seattle.
Tampa Bay at Buffalo
Just for the sake of karma, Buffalo deserves this one.
Bills 24, Bucs 17 (BUF 33, TB 20)
Karma says, "Okay."
Pittsburgh at Chicago
No Polamalu is still better than no Urlacher.
Steelers 33, Bears 17 (CHI 17, PIT 14)
Jeff Reed misses two field goals? Am I cursed this week?
Cleveland at Denver
I think Cleveland’s better than Denver, but I also think Mile High is a huge home field advantage.
Broncos 16, Browns 12 (DEN 27, CLE 6)
Maybe Denver's better than we thought. Let's see them against a top team first.
Baltimore at San Diego
Folks, the Baltimore Ravens are for real this year. I currently have them ranked fourth in the AFC after Pittsburgh, Indy and New England. All the idiots drinking the “Chargers in the Superbowl” Kool-Aid need to remember three things: 1) LaDanian Tomlinson is over the hill; 2) Norv Turner is an idiot; 3) Phillip Rivers is a douche.
Ravens 38, Chargers 17 (BAL 31, SD 26)
Home field was good for an extra score for SD.
NY Giants at Dallas
I don’t usually do this, but SportsCenter tonight pointed out that the Giants are injured, Eli’s never won in Dallas, and Tony Romo is 4-0 over New York at home. I’ll give this one a shot, just once.
Cowboys 27, Giants 20 (NYG 33, DAL 31)
Eli Manning is one cool customer, and this is the last time I listen to ESPN.
Indianapolis at Miami
Hate the Anthony Gonzalez injury, but hey, it’s Indy. I don’t pick against my man crush.
Colts 20, Dolphins 13 (IND 27, MIA 23)
I think the defense is still taking IV fluids, though
This week: 8-8
Last week: 13-3
Season: 21-11 (.656)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
On the first day of Christmas...(updated)
...the Vikings gave to me: Brett Favre as starting QB. It's week one of the NFL, and as usual, here are my game picks. These are the same picks I entered in espn.com's Pigskin Pick'em by the way, so I'm not being wishy-washy with my choices. Also, it's been a busy weekend, so my commentary will be brief. Check back later for results and recaps, and as always, I welcome your comments.
Pittsburgh (13) over Tennessee (10)
Yes, I got my pick in on time Thursday, so this counts.
...but it was a lot closer than I thought it would be.
Atlanta (19) over Miami (7)
Close game, but I'm giving Atlanta the home field edge.
...but give Miami's defense credit for keeping it close.
Cincinnati (7) over Denver (12)
Denver's on the road with no QB and Carson Palmer is healthy again.
...fluke plays like this game-ender are why I never gamble real money on sports.
Minnesota (34) over Cleveland (20)
I think AP may break 150 yards rushing today.
...Brett Favre will be the first one to tell you that this is Adrian Peterson's team. BTW, he had 180 yards and 3 TDs. You should have drafted him for your fantasy team, chump.
Indianapolis (14) over Jacksonville (12)
Watch Peyton light up the Jags defense with his corps of young receivers.
...or not. Whatever, we'll take the win ugly, too.
New Orleans (45) over Detroit (28)
The Saints might be my sleeper pick for this season.
...the Saints' offense is just scary this year.
Dallas (34) over Tampa Bay (21)
The Cowboys stink, but Tampa's in utter chaos.
...but can Tony Romo play this well every week?
Philadelphia (38) over Carolina (10)
Superbowl or bust for this Eagles team.
...just a reminder—I have Minnesota and Philly in my NFC Championship.
Baltimore (38) over Kansas City (24)
The Ravens are contenders, while KC is still in rebuilding mode.
...but give KC credit—they played a hard-fought, close game.
NY Jets (24) over Houston (7)
I still don't understand why so many people pick the Texans to have a good year.
...still don't understand.
NY Giants (23) over Washington (17)
It's hard to beat the Giants at home in the Meadowlands.
...the NFC East is just crazy tough—the best division in the NFL.
Arizona (16) over San Francisco (20)
Warner throws more than 300 yards and 3 TDs.
...uhhh, yeah, not quite. Guh.
Seattle (28) over St. Louis (0)
The Rams might win this game, but Seattle has a considerable home field advantage.
...if the Rams ever move, St. Louis shouldn't worry—they already don't have a professional football team.
Chicago over Green Bay
I like Chicago's defense better than the Packers', and Cutler gives the Bears enough offense to win.
New England over Buffalo
Tom Brady re-establishes his command of the football universe.
San Diego over Oakland
Al Davis could use an intervention.
Season record [as of Sunday afternoon]: 11-2 (.846)
Pittsburgh (13) over Tennessee (10)
Yes, I got my pick in on time Thursday, so this counts.
...but it was a lot closer than I thought it would be.
Atlanta (19) over Miami (7)
Close game, but I'm giving Atlanta the home field edge.
...but give Miami's defense credit for keeping it close.
Cincinnati (7) over Denver (12)
Denver's on the road with no QB and Carson Palmer is healthy again.
...fluke plays like this game-ender are why I never gamble real money on sports.
Minnesota (34) over Cleveland (20)
I think AP may break 150 yards rushing today.
...Brett Favre will be the first one to tell you that this is Adrian Peterson's team. BTW, he had 180 yards and 3 TDs. You should have drafted him for your fantasy team, chump.
Indianapolis (14) over Jacksonville (12)
Watch Peyton light up the Jags defense with his corps of young receivers.
...or not. Whatever, we'll take the win ugly, too.
New Orleans (45) over Detroit (28)
The Saints might be my sleeper pick for this season.
...the Saints' offense is just scary this year.
Dallas (34) over Tampa Bay (21)
The Cowboys stink, but Tampa's in utter chaos.
...but can Tony Romo play this well every week?
Philadelphia (38) over Carolina (10)
Superbowl or bust for this Eagles team.
...just a reminder—I have Minnesota and Philly in my NFC Championship.
Baltimore (38) over Kansas City (24)
The Ravens are contenders, while KC is still in rebuilding mode.
...but give KC credit—they played a hard-fought, close game.
NY Jets (24) over Houston (7)
I still don't understand why so many people pick the Texans to have a good year.
...still don't understand.
NY Giants (23) over Washington (17)
It's hard to beat the Giants at home in the Meadowlands.
...the NFC East is just crazy tough—the best division in the NFL.
Arizona (16) over San Francisco (20)
Warner throws more than 300 yards and 3 TDs.
...uhhh, yeah, not quite. Guh.
Seattle (28) over St. Louis (0)
The Rams might win this game, but Seattle has a considerable home field advantage.
...if the Rams ever move, St. Louis shouldn't worry—they already don't have a professional football team.
Chicago over Green Bay
I like Chicago's defense better than the Packers', and Cutler gives the Bears enough offense to win.
New England over Buffalo
Tom Brady re-establishes his command of the football universe.
San Diego over Oakland
Al Davis could use an intervention.
Season record [as of Sunday afternoon]: 11-2 (.846)
Thursday, September 10, 2009
This won't come as a big surprise...
Okay, here are my NFL picks! Guess who I'm picking to win it all this year?
AFC East
New England Patriots—Brady returns with a grudge.
Buffalo Bills—Terrell Owens plays nicely with others.
Miami Dolphins—tougher schedule brings 'phins back to reality.
New York Jets—Mark Sanchez is no Joe Namath...at least, not yet.
AFC North
Pittsburgh Steelers—the champs repeat.
Baltimore Ravens—still punishing opponents on defense.
Cincinnati Bengals—at least their offense will be entertaining.
Cleveland Browns—basically a tire fire.
AFC South
Indianapolis Colts—Manning throws for more than 30 TDs.
Tennessee Titans—Kerry Collins is old; Vince Young is bad.
Jacksonville Jaguars—tough defense, boring offense.
Houston Texans—go ahead, pick them as your sleeper.
AFC West
San Diego Chargers—win by default because this division is putrid.
Denver Broncos—Bowlen will regret turning his staff over last year.
Oakland Raiders—still a grease fire.
Kansas City Chiefs—in year nine of their "rebuilding" plan.
AFC Wild Cards
Baltimore Ravens, Tennessee Titans
NFC East
Philadelphia Eagles—offense is full of playmakers; defense playing for memory of Jim Jackson.
New York Giants—Eli still needs better receivers.
Washington Redskins—don't like any of their QBs, especially since they cut Chase Daniel.
Dallas Cowboys—would you want Wade Phillips coaching your team?
NFC North
Minnesota Vikings—Brett Favre. Adrian Peterson. Vicious defense. The time is now.
Chicago Bears—Cutler plays well; defense is always tough.
Green Bay Packers—Rodgers plays well; defense stinks.
Detroit Lions—a floating oil fire.
NFC South
New Orleans Saints—an offensive dynamo.
Atlanta Falcons—taking a step back this year.
Carolina Panthers—happy trails, John Fox.
Tampa Bay Bucanneers—can you name anyone on their roster?
NFC West
Arizona Cardinals—Warner to Fitzgerald and Boldin.
San Francisco 49ers—Singletary needs a quarterback.
Seattle Seahawks—new coach, old QB, not much talent.
St. Louis Rams—better than last year, but still a long way to go, and I hate Marc Bulger.
NFC Wild Cards
New York Giants, Chicago Bears
AFC Championship
Pittsburgh over New England
NFC Championship
Minnesota over Philadelphia
SuperBowl
Minnesota 27, Pittsburgh 24
That was probably the least surprising pick of all time, right?
AFC East
New England Patriots—Brady returns with a grudge.
Buffalo Bills—Terrell Owens plays nicely with others.
Miami Dolphins—tougher schedule brings 'phins back to reality.
New York Jets—Mark Sanchez is no Joe Namath...at least, not yet.
AFC North
Pittsburgh Steelers—the champs repeat.
Baltimore Ravens—still punishing opponents on defense.
Cincinnati Bengals—at least their offense will be entertaining.
Cleveland Browns—basically a tire fire.
AFC South
Indianapolis Colts—Manning throws for more than 30 TDs.
Tennessee Titans—Kerry Collins is old; Vince Young is bad.
Jacksonville Jaguars—tough defense, boring offense.
Houston Texans—go ahead, pick them as your sleeper.
AFC West
San Diego Chargers—win by default because this division is putrid.
Denver Broncos—Bowlen will regret turning his staff over last year.
Oakland Raiders—still a grease fire.
Kansas City Chiefs—in year nine of their "rebuilding" plan.
AFC Wild Cards
Baltimore Ravens, Tennessee Titans
NFC East
Philadelphia Eagles—offense is full of playmakers; defense playing for memory of Jim Jackson.
New York Giants—Eli still needs better receivers.
Washington Redskins—don't like any of their QBs, especially since they cut Chase Daniel.
Dallas Cowboys—would you want Wade Phillips coaching your team?
NFC North
Minnesota Vikings—Brett Favre. Adrian Peterson. Vicious defense. The time is now.
Chicago Bears—Cutler plays well; defense is always tough.
Green Bay Packers—Rodgers plays well; defense stinks.
Detroit Lions—a floating oil fire.
NFC South
New Orleans Saints—an offensive dynamo.
Atlanta Falcons—taking a step back this year.
Carolina Panthers—happy trails, John Fox.
Tampa Bay Bucanneers—can you name anyone on their roster?
NFC West
Arizona Cardinals—Warner to Fitzgerald and Boldin.
San Francisco 49ers—Singletary needs a quarterback.
Seattle Seahawks—new coach, old QB, not much talent.
St. Louis Rams—better than last year, but still a long way to go, and I hate Marc Bulger.
NFC Wild Cards
New York Giants, Chicago Bears
AFC Championship
Pittsburgh over New England
NFC Championship
Minnesota over Philadelphia
SuperBowl
Minnesota 27, Pittsburgh 24
That was probably the least surprising pick of all time, right?
Friday, August 28, 2009
"Genius" only goes so far
While I'm eagerly awaiting tonight's home debut by new Cardinals pitcher John Smoltz, I'm also still steaming over Thursday's pointless and unnecessary loss to NL Central also-rans Houston Astros. What is it about these guys that baffles us so much? They're a sub-.500 team with aging stars—why can't we hit a single with a guy on second?
I'll tell you why: because Tony LaRussa keeps putting Colby Rasmus and Rick Ankiel into the lineup. Results? Pop-ups, weak ground outs and infuriating strike outs, especially from Ankiel, who couldn't find the strike zone if you lit it up with bright neon-colored laser beams.
LaRussa's continued reliance on these two sure outs means that a more effective lineup hasn't had time to gel. So I would like to humbly submit my own lineup proposal, one that gives us the best chance of wrapping up this division before the middle of September.
1. Skip Shumaker—RF
2. Brendan Ryan—SS
3. Albert Pujols—1B
4. Matt Holliday—LF
5. Ryan Ludwick—CF
6. Mark DeRosa—3B
7. Yadier Molina—C
8. Julio Lugo—2B
9. pitcher
Yeah, I know I'm putting Skip back in the outfield after playing a better-than-expected second all season, but you've got to keep both him and Lugo in the lineup. If you need to bring a left-hander off the bench to pinch hit, Ankiel and Rasmus are still good for three strikes.
There's no way LaRussa's going to change his mind—he kept putting Chris Duncan on the lineup card until John Mozeliak had no choice but to trade him for everyone's collective sanity, but if the Cardinals keep taxing their bullpen, wasting quality starts and stranding men in scoring position, it's just the type of thing to give the Cubs hope for a late, last-gasp run.
Don't be like a James Bond villain. When you've got your enemy on the ground and under your boot, step on his throat until he stops breathing.
I'll tell you why: because Tony LaRussa keeps putting Colby Rasmus and Rick Ankiel into the lineup. Results? Pop-ups, weak ground outs and infuriating strike outs, especially from Ankiel, who couldn't find the strike zone if you lit it up with bright neon-colored laser beams.
LaRussa's continued reliance on these two sure outs means that a more effective lineup hasn't had time to gel. So I would like to humbly submit my own lineup proposal, one that gives us the best chance of wrapping up this division before the middle of September.
1. Skip Shumaker—RF
2. Brendan Ryan—SS
3. Albert Pujols—1B
4. Matt Holliday—LF
5. Ryan Ludwick—CF
6. Mark DeRosa—3B
7. Yadier Molina—C
8. Julio Lugo—2B
9. pitcher
Yeah, I know I'm putting Skip back in the outfield after playing a better-than-expected second all season, but you've got to keep both him and Lugo in the lineup. If you need to bring a left-hander off the bench to pinch hit, Ankiel and Rasmus are still good for three strikes.
There's no way LaRussa's going to change his mind—he kept putting Chris Duncan on the lineup card until John Mozeliak had no choice but to trade him for everyone's collective sanity, but if the Cardinals keep taxing their bullpen, wasting quality starts and stranding men in scoring position, it's just the type of thing to give the Cubs hope for a late, last-gasp run.
Don't be like a James Bond villain. When you've got your enemy on the ground and under your boot, step on his throat until he stops breathing.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Smoltz Adds Another Dimension
Cardinal Nation watched with particularly high interest and anticipation Sunday afternoon as the Redbirds wrapped up a four-game series with the Padres in the perpetually beautiful San Diego weather. Tony LaRussa used yet another pitcher in the useless five-hole in the rotation, inhabited this season by minor-league pitchers like Todd Wellemeyer and Mitchell Boggs. Today, however, the man on the mound was a pitcher who could take a weekend off to pose for his bust in Cooperstown—John Smoltz.
Released by the Boston Red Sox for eight inefficient starts, it was hard to know what to expect. Smoltz is certainly one of the smartest and most experienced pitchers. Heaven knows Cardinals fans remember what it was like to watch him dash our World Series hopes back in 1996. Former Cy Young winner, the only pitcher in major league history to record both 200 wins and 150 saves, Smoltz is a living legend. Now he joins fellow living legend-in-the-making Albert Pujols to see if the Cardinals can climb that mountain yet again.
What would the Cardinals get from Smoltz today? Average stuff? Blasted out by the third inning? Unexpected strength? Wit and resolve without much physical skill left in the tank? None of the above—five innings, three hits, no walks, nine strikeouts that included seven in a row. Smoltz didn't just exceed expectations; he hit them further out of the ballpark than El Hombre's opposite-field homer.
With afterthought pitcher Kyle Lohse-er on the DL again, Smoltz just advanced himself into the fourth spot in the rotation, as the Cards recalled Mitchell Boggs to once again pitch out of the five spot, a role that has become the equivalent of a Star Trek enlisted man wearing a red tunic on an away team.
Everyone knows that Smoltz brings a wealth of experience and leadership into both the clubhouse and the dugout, and no one in my generation has pitched better in the postseason with perhaps the exception of Curt Schilling. That was what we expected, and it is certain to make a difference in the stretch run.
But what Smoltz showed us today is that if he can duplicate today's masterful performance a few more times, the Cardinals have a legitimate chance to win four out of every five games the rest of the way. It allows Lohse to get fully healthy as well as taking some of the pressure off of Boggs or whoever else they throw to the Wolves on day five.
Smoltz really did show flashes of his old brilliance today. His arm simply isn't strong enough to throw a 90-plus mph fastball anymore, but at age 42, he was painting the corners and spinning his split-finger pitch off the edge of the table like his vintage days in Atlanta. Even after two errors put men on first and second with no one out in the first inning, he stayed cool and kept throwing ground ball outs. Even if his arm is 100 percent, his mind is still strong enough to get batters out.
For all the fan crap GM John Mozeliak has taken—and much of it was deserved last year—he has done more than any other GM in the major leagues to set his team up for a postseason run. In a seven game series, we would pitch two Cy Young candidates, Carp and Waino, ground ball wizard Joel Piñero, and possibly future Hall of Famer John Smoltz. That sounds like a winning rotation to me.
Released by the Boston Red Sox for eight inefficient starts, it was hard to know what to expect. Smoltz is certainly one of the smartest and most experienced pitchers. Heaven knows Cardinals fans remember what it was like to watch him dash our World Series hopes back in 1996. Former Cy Young winner, the only pitcher in major league history to record both 200 wins and 150 saves, Smoltz is a living legend. Now he joins fellow living legend-in-the-making Albert Pujols to see if the Cardinals can climb that mountain yet again.
What would the Cardinals get from Smoltz today? Average stuff? Blasted out by the third inning? Unexpected strength? Wit and resolve without much physical skill left in the tank? None of the above—five innings, three hits, no walks, nine strikeouts that included seven in a row. Smoltz didn't just exceed expectations; he hit them further out of the ballpark than El Hombre's opposite-field homer.
With afterthought pitcher Kyle Lohse-er on the DL again, Smoltz just advanced himself into the fourth spot in the rotation, as the Cards recalled Mitchell Boggs to once again pitch out of the five spot, a role that has become the equivalent of a Star Trek enlisted man wearing a red tunic on an away team.
Everyone knows that Smoltz brings a wealth of experience and leadership into both the clubhouse and the dugout, and no one in my generation has pitched better in the postseason with perhaps the exception of Curt Schilling. That was what we expected, and it is certain to make a difference in the stretch run.
But what Smoltz showed us today is that if he can duplicate today's masterful performance a few more times, the Cardinals have a legitimate chance to win four out of every five games the rest of the way. It allows Lohse to get fully healthy as well as taking some of the pressure off of Boggs or whoever else they throw to the Wolves on day five.
Smoltz really did show flashes of his old brilliance today. His arm simply isn't strong enough to throw a 90-plus mph fastball anymore, but at age 42, he was painting the corners and spinning his split-finger pitch off the edge of the table like his vintage days in Atlanta. Even after two errors put men on first and second with no one out in the first inning, he stayed cool and kept throwing ground ball outs. Even if his arm is 100 percent, his mind is still strong enough to get batters out.
For all the fan crap GM John Mozeliak has taken—and much of it was deserved last year—he has done more than any other GM in the major leagues to set his team up for a postseason run. In a seven game series, we would pitch two Cy Young candidates, Carp and Waino, ground ball wizard Joel Piñero, and possibly future Hall of Famer John Smoltz. That sounds like a winning rotation to me.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Americans are Communists
For all of the bluster about Obama being a liberal (he isn't) who is leading the U.S. into socialism (it's not) and all the concurrent yelling and screaming about FREEDOM!!! ...the truth is that most Americans, when push comes to shove, are really communists at heart. I don't mean theoretically sounds Marxists or Chinese Communo-capitalists or Latin American popular dictators—I mean old-school European Soviet Communists; you know, the kind who talk about "we're a democratic and free country," but who really mean, "you are free to do only what we say you can do."
I first realized this at the beginning of the decade when I served a three-year term on our city council here in my home town. Part of my duties included serving on a number of citizens advisory boards, including the one for Parks and Recreation. The park department had successfully passed a modest sales tax increase to fund their operations, and after several years of outstanding management with no pay raises at all, the Park Board budgeted a substantial raise for the director. People here freaked out. We had a public hearing at the library, and there were more than 50 people there, and they all basically had the same thing to say: "I couldn't get that big of a raise at my job, so why should he get such a big raise?"
Communists.
Practically everyone who has a comment on Brett Favre and his recent signing with the Minnesota Vikings, including my childhood hero and the reason I'm a Vikings fan, Fran Tarkenton, are communists. The line basically goes like this: "Favre said he retired. He has no right to come out of retirement. The Vikings said they were moving on. They had no right to sign Favre after all."
Give me a freaking break, communists. Let me address the critics one by one.
Fran Tarkenton: Dude, I love you; you're my hero, and I'll always cherish the memories, but here's the reality—no one outside of Minnesota even knows who you are anymore. Who's next, Bud Grant? I would give anything to have seen you raise that Lombardi trophy, but you had three tries to get it done and came up short each time. Chill out on the anger. The Vikings are better with Favre than without him.
Sports writers and TV commentators: These people are maggots and parasites. I think about them the way Lou Brown, manager for the Cleveland Indians in "Major League" does: "I'm for wasting sports writers' time; let's see if we can make them eat a s*** sandwich." They all whine about how sick they are of the Brett Favre story, then talk about it all day long. LIARS! You love Brett Favre! You worship Brett Favre! You light candles at an altar in the break room in prayer that Favre does this year after year so you have something to talk about! Does anyone think the national media would have more than 30 seconds to talk about the Vikings other than, "Vikings lose, their QBs suck," with their previous QB staff? Please...
Green Bay Packers: I'm an old-school Vikings fan, so anything that cause pain and angst for Packers fans and players gives me the warm, soothing comfort that only schadenfreude can bring. Upset? Burning Favre jerseys? Losing sleep at night? Eating way too many sausages? Slipping deeper and deeper into dysfunctional alcoholism? Good! It's what you cheese heads deserve!
Minnesota Vikings: Let me quote former Jets and Chiefs head coach Herm Edwards: "You play...to win...the game!" The only Vikings players upset with the Favre signing are named Sage and Tarvaris (stupid names for QBs anyway). The fact of the matter is that if either one of them had enough skills to start and win in the NFL, none of this ever would have happened. Favre was Minnesota's best option to win it all now, this year, while all their pieces are in place. If you want to know the reality of this signing, look at Vikings single-game and season ticket sales since the signing was announced—they had to shut it down because the demand crashed their computers. Real Vikings fans know that T-Jack was worse than Marc Bulger; we were never going to win with him. Rosenfels was a backup on a Houston team that can't finish better than .500. Neither of these guys was going to take us to the top of the mountain. Maybe Favre won't, but we know that he can.
Everyone else: Freedom means freedom to do something that you don't agree with or like. It also means the freedom to voice your displeasure, but when your only argument is, "He said he retired; he should stay retired. The Vikings shouldn't have signed him (even though he was a free agent) because it's not fair to the other quarterbacks. Favre shouldn't play for Minnesota because he used to play for Green Bay," then as far as I'm concerned, you're one of those sad people in the library complaining that someone else doing a different job than you do for a different company than you work for is getting a raise that seems too big just because you've never gotten one of those yourself. And when you demand that everyone be treated the same, and you impose arbitrary rules upon everyone else based on your perception of what constitutes fairness, then that makes you a...
communist.
I first realized this at the beginning of the decade when I served a three-year term on our city council here in my home town. Part of my duties included serving on a number of citizens advisory boards, including the one for Parks and Recreation. The park department had successfully passed a modest sales tax increase to fund their operations, and after several years of outstanding management with no pay raises at all, the Park Board budgeted a substantial raise for the director. People here freaked out. We had a public hearing at the library, and there were more than 50 people there, and they all basically had the same thing to say: "I couldn't get that big of a raise at my job, so why should he get such a big raise?"
Communists.
Practically everyone who has a comment on Brett Favre and his recent signing with the Minnesota Vikings, including my childhood hero and the reason I'm a Vikings fan, Fran Tarkenton, are communists. The line basically goes like this: "Favre said he retired. He has no right to come out of retirement. The Vikings said they were moving on. They had no right to sign Favre after all."
Give me a freaking break, communists. Let me address the critics one by one.
Fran Tarkenton: Dude, I love you; you're my hero, and I'll always cherish the memories, but here's the reality—no one outside of Minnesota even knows who you are anymore. Who's next, Bud Grant? I would give anything to have seen you raise that Lombardi trophy, but you had three tries to get it done and came up short each time. Chill out on the anger. The Vikings are better with Favre than without him.
Sports writers and TV commentators: These people are maggots and parasites. I think about them the way Lou Brown, manager for the Cleveland Indians in "Major League" does: "I'm for wasting sports writers' time; let's see if we can make them eat a s*** sandwich." They all whine about how sick they are of the Brett Favre story, then talk about it all day long. LIARS! You love Brett Favre! You worship Brett Favre! You light candles at an altar in the break room in prayer that Favre does this year after year so you have something to talk about! Does anyone think the national media would have more than 30 seconds to talk about the Vikings other than, "Vikings lose, their QBs suck," with their previous QB staff? Please...
Green Bay Packers: I'm an old-school Vikings fan, so anything that cause pain and angst for Packers fans and players gives me the warm, soothing comfort that only schadenfreude can bring. Upset? Burning Favre jerseys? Losing sleep at night? Eating way too many sausages? Slipping deeper and deeper into dysfunctional alcoholism? Good! It's what you cheese heads deserve!
Minnesota Vikings: Let me quote former Jets and Chiefs head coach Herm Edwards: "You play...to win...the game!" The only Vikings players upset with the Favre signing are named Sage and Tarvaris (stupid names for QBs anyway). The fact of the matter is that if either one of them had enough skills to start and win in the NFL, none of this ever would have happened. Favre was Minnesota's best option to win it all now, this year, while all their pieces are in place. If you want to know the reality of this signing, look at Vikings single-game and season ticket sales since the signing was announced—they had to shut it down because the demand crashed their computers. Real Vikings fans know that T-Jack was worse than Marc Bulger; we were never going to win with him. Rosenfels was a backup on a Houston team that can't finish better than .500. Neither of these guys was going to take us to the top of the mountain. Maybe Favre won't, but we know that he can.
Everyone else: Freedom means freedom to do something that you don't agree with or like. It also means the freedom to voice your displeasure, but when your only argument is, "He said he retired; he should stay retired. The Vikings shouldn't have signed him (even though he was a free agent) because it's not fair to the other quarterbacks. Favre shouldn't play for Minnesota because he used to play for Green Bay," then as far as I'm concerned, you're one of those sad people in the library complaining that someone else doing a different job than you do for a different company than you work for is getting a raise that seems too big just because you've never gotten one of those yourself. And when you demand that everyone be treated the same, and you impose arbitrary rules upon everyone else based on your perception of what constitutes fairness, then that makes you a...
communist.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Oh Happy Day!
The Minnesota Vikings signed Brett Favre yesterday...
Does this mean the Vikings are the NFC favorites to go to the Superbowl? To win the Superbowl? Well, to paraphrase Winston Wolf from Pulp Fiction, "Let's not start sucking each other's [lollipops] just yet." While this Vikings fan is excited that we have a quarterback with the experience and skills to win it all, I also want to break this down calmly and rationally.
PRO-VIKINGS
• Best run-stop defense in the league—you just can't run on them.
• An improving secondary anchored by Antoine Winfield, who just signed a big contract.
• The best running back in the NFL, Adrian Peterson, paired up with pro-bowl caliber running back Chester Taylor—simply the best ground attack in the league.
• First-round pick Percy Harvin adding blinding speed to the passing game and possible the running game as well. This guy's faster than AP, if you can believe that.
• Possibly the best offensive line in the the league, and certainly the best left side tackle and guard to protect Favre's blind side as well as clear out running lanes for the ground game.
PRO-FAVRE
• Experience that no other Vikings QB even comes close to.
• The ability to complete third-down passes into tight zones and past defenders.
• The arm strength—surgically rebuilt and tested—to heave the ball downfield to Harvin or Bernard Berrian.
• Mental toughness and on-field leadership, especially late in games.
• Two Superbowls, one win, and the desire to go out on top just one more time.
ANTI-FAVRE
• Almost 40 years old. I'm 41, and a long walk makes me sore. Can he physically endure the grind of a five-month season?
• Surgically repaired arm that is still not 100 percent.
• Throws lots of stupid interceptions.
Will this work? Experience says no. Joe Montana was younger and healthier when he was traded to Kansas City, and although he made the Chiefs exciting contenders, he couldn't get back up the mountain. On the other hand, the Vikings have had luck in the past with over-the-hill QBs such as Warren Moon and Randall Cunningham. If we only had Randy Moss around for one more season, as well.
Look, here's the bottom line for me. I'm thinking about the Vikings' playoff loss at home to the Eagles. All Tarvaris Jackson had to do was complete a few short third down passes, but every time he just threw the ball into the turf. The Eagles put nine men on the line to stop AP because they knew T-Jack couldn't complete a pass. With Favre, if any defense stacks against the run, he connects for a long pass. If they play nickel, one of the runners gains ten yards. Pick your poison, but the Vikings are good for at least 24-28 points a game this season.
Will all this translate into postseason glory? Who can tell? Last season, it would have been easy to pick Pittsburgh since they're good every year and almost always in the discussion, but Kurt Warner and the Arizona freaking Cardinals? I dare you to find anyone who picked them to win the NFC. Winning a championship takes luck, good health, fortunate calls, hard work and mad skills. With Favre, all the pieces are in place. But they still have to play the games.
But boy, will these games be fun to watch.
Does this mean the Vikings are the NFC favorites to go to the Superbowl? To win the Superbowl? Well, to paraphrase Winston Wolf from Pulp Fiction, "Let's not start sucking each other's [lollipops] just yet." While this Vikings fan is excited that we have a quarterback with the experience and skills to win it all, I also want to break this down calmly and rationally.
PRO-VIKINGS
• Best run-stop defense in the league—you just can't run on them.
• An improving secondary anchored by Antoine Winfield, who just signed a big contract.
• The best running back in the NFL, Adrian Peterson, paired up with pro-bowl caliber running back Chester Taylor—simply the best ground attack in the league.
• First-round pick Percy Harvin adding blinding speed to the passing game and possible the running game as well. This guy's faster than AP, if you can believe that.
• Possibly the best offensive line in the the league, and certainly the best left side tackle and guard to protect Favre's blind side as well as clear out running lanes for the ground game.
PRO-FAVRE
• Experience that no other Vikings QB even comes close to.
• The ability to complete third-down passes into tight zones and past defenders.
• The arm strength—surgically rebuilt and tested—to heave the ball downfield to Harvin or Bernard Berrian.
• Mental toughness and on-field leadership, especially late in games.
• Two Superbowls, one win, and the desire to go out on top just one more time.
ANTI-FAVRE
• Almost 40 years old. I'm 41, and a long walk makes me sore. Can he physically endure the grind of a five-month season?
• Surgically repaired arm that is still not 100 percent.
• Throws lots of stupid interceptions.
Will this work? Experience says no. Joe Montana was younger and healthier when he was traded to Kansas City, and although he made the Chiefs exciting contenders, he couldn't get back up the mountain. On the other hand, the Vikings have had luck in the past with over-the-hill QBs such as Warren Moon and Randall Cunningham. If we only had Randy Moss around for one more season, as well.
Look, here's the bottom line for me. I'm thinking about the Vikings' playoff loss at home to the Eagles. All Tarvaris Jackson had to do was complete a few short third down passes, but every time he just threw the ball into the turf. The Eagles put nine men on the line to stop AP because they knew T-Jack couldn't complete a pass. With Favre, if any defense stacks against the run, he connects for a long pass. If they play nickel, one of the runners gains ten yards. Pick your poison, but the Vikings are good for at least 24-28 points a game this season.
Will all this translate into postseason glory? Who can tell? Last season, it would have been easy to pick Pittsburgh since they're good every year and almost always in the discussion, but Kurt Warner and the Arizona freaking Cardinals? I dare you to find anyone who picked them to win the NFC. Winning a championship takes luck, good health, fortunate calls, hard work and mad skills. With Favre, all the pieces are in place. But they still have to play the games.
But boy, will these games be fun to watch.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Restarting for a new (sports) year
For any of you who have tuned in to "The Sandlot" in the past, consider this a new beginning. For those who are visiting for the first time, welcome to sports commentary from the common-sense view of the devoted van. You won't get endless analysis, obscure 1970s references, and certainly no trace of East Coast bias. What you will get is honest fan opinion that mainly focuses on Midwest sports teams.
I haven't posted at all over the summer, mainly due to an unusually busy real-life workload. Now that fall has arrived—at least in terms of a new school year, if not yet reflected by the weather—it's high time for me to tune back in to the pulse of sports.
Baseball is reaching the height of its pennant races. The Cardinals added three important pieces—Matt Holliday, Mark DeRosa and Julio Lugo—but didn't strengthen their starting pitching or their right-handed bullpen. They only have three dependable starters, Cy Young candidates Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright, plus the rejuvenated Joel Piñero, but Kyle Lohse has not shown the form that distinguished him last season. They don't have a fifth starter at all. Will this be enough to keep the Cubs at bay until the playoffs? Is there any chance they might pick up released future Hall of Famer John Smoltz? Will Tony LaRussa ever stop bringing Dennys "Restaurant" Reyes out of the bullpen? Stay tuned—we will keep our attention focused on baseball's best player, Albert Pujols, and the rest of the Redbirds as they fight for another NL Central title.
Fall means football, and long-time readers know that I'm all about the pigskin, both college and pro. Let's start with my alma mater, the Missouri Tigers. The so-called experts, those guys who get paid to give you what I do for free, have picked them to finish at least behind Nebraska in the Big 12 North. Granted, losing Chase Daniel, Jeremy Maclin and Chase Coffman leaves some substantial shoes to fill, but the lack of expectations combined with the potential shown by new sophomore starting QB Blaine Gabbert (highly recruited by Nebraska, by the way) may surprise a lot of doubters once the conference season starts. I'm picking the Tigers to go 8-4, by the way. Not great, but I went to Mizzou during the Woody Widenhofer and Bob Stull errors. (No, I didn't mean "eras.")
Picking pro football results is a bit easier than baseball picks—it's a shorter season, and coaching and talent eliminates about 25 percent of the teams before the season even starts—but it's always a surprise to see who's left standing come January. I will return on opening week with a series of divisional previews, but for now, here's what I'm looking for with the teams I follow: 1) Will Brett Favre really stay retired, or will he take once last shot at glory and try to take the Vikings to the Promised Land at last? This much is clear—all the championship pieces are in place except for the guy under center. Answer: no one knows, probably not even Favre himself.
2) How bad will the Rams be this year? Answer: pretty bad. They don't have any talent, and they have maybe the worst QB in the league in Marc Bulger. New head coach Steve Spagnuolo will bring energy and toughness, but this team will be lucky to make it to six wins. Look for them to jettison Bulger at the end of the season when his ridiculous contract won't kill their salary cap number.
3) How will the Colts react to a new head coach? Answer: It's too soon to tell. Peyton Manning is still the best QB in the league, but does he have the skill players around him to reach another championship? Jim Caldwell was hand-picked by Tony Dungy to succeed him, but the Colts also lost their offensive line coach and offensive coordinator—the only ones Manning has ever played under—to retirement. With the departure of Marvin Harrison, this may just be too many changes to cope with in a division with Jacksonville, Houston and Tennessee.
What else is on the horizon? Hometown hero Tyler Hansbrough starts his rookie season for the Indiana Pacers, the St. Louis Blues try to build on the promise of last year's playoff season, the Mizzou basketball team returns from a Sweet Sixteen run in the Big Dance last year, and Shaq and LeBron team up to try to bring a championship to Cleveland for the first time since...well, I'm not old enough to remember.
Welcome back to The Sandlot. Stop by, read, comment, and be the best fan that you can.
I haven't posted at all over the summer, mainly due to an unusually busy real-life workload. Now that fall has arrived—at least in terms of a new school year, if not yet reflected by the weather—it's high time for me to tune back in to the pulse of sports.
Baseball is reaching the height of its pennant races. The Cardinals added three important pieces—Matt Holliday, Mark DeRosa and Julio Lugo—but didn't strengthen their starting pitching or their right-handed bullpen. They only have three dependable starters, Cy Young candidates Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright, plus the rejuvenated Joel Piñero, but Kyle Lohse has not shown the form that distinguished him last season. They don't have a fifth starter at all. Will this be enough to keep the Cubs at bay until the playoffs? Is there any chance they might pick up released future Hall of Famer John Smoltz? Will Tony LaRussa ever stop bringing Dennys "Restaurant" Reyes out of the bullpen? Stay tuned—we will keep our attention focused on baseball's best player, Albert Pujols, and the rest of the Redbirds as they fight for another NL Central title.
Fall means football, and long-time readers know that I'm all about the pigskin, both college and pro. Let's start with my alma mater, the Missouri Tigers. The so-called experts, those guys who get paid to give you what I do for free, have picked them to finish at least behind Nebraska in the Big 12 North. Granted, losing Chase Daniel, Jeremy Maclin and Chase Coffman leaves some substantial shoes to fill, but the lack of expectations combined with the potential shown by new sophomore starting QB Blaine Gabbert (highly recruited by Nebraska, by the way) may surprise a lot of doubters once the conference season starts. I'm picking the Tigers to go 8-4, by the way. Not great, but I went to Mizzou during the Woody Widenhofer and Bob Stull errors. (No, I didn't mean "eras.")
Picking pro football results is a bit easier than baseball picks—it's a shorter season, and coaching and talent eliminates about 25 percent of the teams before the season even starts—but it's always a surprise to see who's left standing come January. I will return on opening week with a series of divisional previews, but for now, here's what I'm looking for with the teams I follow: 1) Will Brett Favre really stay retired, or will he take once last shot at glory and try to take the Vikings to the Promised Land at last? This much is clear—all the championship pieces are in place except for the guy under center. Answer: no one knows, probably not even Favre himself.
2) How bad will the Rams be this year? Answer: pretty bad. They don't have any talent, and they have maybe the worst QB in the league in Marc Bulger. New head coach Steve Spagnuolo will bring energy and toughness, but this team will be lucky to make it to six wins. Look for them to jettison Bulger at the end of the season when his ridiculous contract won't kill their salary cap number.
3) How will the Colts react to a new head coach? Answer: It's too soon to tell. Peyton Manning is still the best QB in the league, but does he have the skill players around him to reach another championship? Jim Caldwell was hand-picked by Tony Dungy to succeed him, but the Colts also lost their offensive line coach and offensive coordinator—the only ones Manning has ever played under—to retirement. With the departure of Marvin Harrison, this may just be too many changes to cope with in a division with Jacksonville, Houston and Tennessee.
What else is on the horizon? Hometown hero Tyler Hansbrough starts his rookie season for the Indiana Pacers, the St. Louis Blues try to build on the promise of last year's playoff season, the Mizzou basketball team returns from a Sweet Sixteen run in the Big Dance last year, and Shaq and LeBron team up to try to bring a championship to Cleveland for the first time since...well, I'm not old enough to remember.
Welcome back to The Sandlot. Stop by, read, comment, and be the best fan that you can.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
NCAA Tournament Bracket Challenge
Well, friends, it's that time of year again: March Madness, where you get to test your expertise, luck and/or psychic abilities in trying to win your brackets. If you want to play against the denizens of The Sandlot, go to espn.com and enter the Tournament Bracket challenge. At some point, you will see a link that will allow you to "Create or Join Group." Search for "Sandman's Sandlot," then join the group. You can enter up to 10 different brackets, but you must enter before this Thursday, so get started now!
Sunday, October 19, 2008
NFL Picks, Week Seven
The Big 12 North should just become a separate football conference. The likes of Mizzou, Kansas and even Nebraska just can't compete with professional-level programs like Oklahoma and Texas. I guess it was fun while it lasted, but college is even more divided between haves and have-nots than the pros. Speaking of the NFL...
BUFFALO over San Diego
Bills are coming off a bye week, and San Diego has stunk on the road this season
BEARS over Vikings
No coach is more hated by both fans and players than Brad Childress.
Steelers over BENGALS
I'm not sure why Marvin Lewis doesn't just walk away from this mess.
Tennessee over KANSAS CITY
KC's simply overmatched talent-wise in every phase of the game.
CAROLINA over New Orleans
Two unpredictable teams, and Carolina is my kryptonite pick, but I'm still taking them at home.
ST. LOUIS over Dallas
No Romo, Rams at home and fired up over their first surprising win under Haslett—I know this is a stretch, but you have to take risks to win.
MIAMI over Baltimore
Okay, I'm not picking against Miami this week. Let's see how this works out.
NY GIANTS over San Francisco
The Giants will bounce back big after their dispirited loss to Cleveland last Monday.
HOUSTON over Detroit
I have nothing to say about this awful game except that it better not be on TV in Missouri.
NY JETS over Oakland
Yeah, firing Lane Kiffin was a great idea, Al. All your ideas are right, Mr. Davis. Would somebody tell me when Monty Burns bought the Raiders?
WASHINGTON over Cleveland
The Skins will bounce back, while the Browns will have a letdown.
Colts over PACKERS
I can't believe I need to say this, but don't sleep on Peyton Manning.
TAMPA BAY over Seattle
Good grief, Seattle is a god-awful team. They might actually finish behind the Rams at this point.
NEW ENGLAND over Denver
Denver is terribly inconsistent, and the Patriots don't usually lose two in a row, especially playing Monday night at home.
Last week: 10-4
Season: 57-31 (.648)
BUFFALO over San Diego
Bills are coming off a bye week, and San Diego has stunk on the road this season
BEARS over Vikings
No coach is more hated by both fans and players than Brad Childress.
Steelers over BENGALS
I'm not sure why Marvin Lewis doesn't just walk away from this mess.
Tennessee over KANSAS CITY
KC's simply overmatched talent-wise in every phase of the game.
CAROLINA over New Orleans
Two unpredictable teams, and Carolina is my kryptonite pick, but I'm still taking them at home.
ST. LOUIS over Dallas
No Romo, Rams at home and fired up over their first surprising win under Haslett—I know this is a stretch, but you have to take risks to win.
MIAMI over Baltimore
Okay, I'm not picking against Miami this week. Let's see how this works out.
NY GIANTS over San Francisco
The Giants will bounce back big after their dispirited loss to Cleveland last Monday.
HOUSTON over Detroit
I have nothing to say about this awful game except that it better not be on TV in Missouri.
NY JETS over Oakland
Yeah, firing Lane Kiffin was a great idea, Al. All your ideas are right, Mr. Davis. Would somebody tell me when Monty Burns bought the Raiders?
WASHINGTON over Cleveland
The Skins will bounce back, while the Browns will have a letdown.
Colts over PACKERS
I can't believe I need to say this, but don't sleep on Peyton Manning.
TAMPA BAY over Seattle
Good grief, Seattle is a god-awful team. They might actually finish behind the Rams at this point.
NEW ENGLAND over Denver
Denver is terribly inconsistent, and the Patriots don't usually lose two in a row, especially playing Monday night at home.
Last week: 10-4
Season: 57-31 (.648)
Monday, October 13, 2008
Quick Picks (and late) for NFL Week Six
You'll have to take my word that these were my ESPN Pigskin Pick'em Picks; you can see for yourself by navigating with the site link to the left and searching group "The Sandlot."
Atlanta over Chicago (correct)
Carolina over Tampa (wrong)
Washington over St. Louis (wrong)
Houston over Miami (correct)
Indianapolis over Baltimore (correct)
Minnesota over Detroit (correct)
New Orleans over Oakland (correct)
NY Jets over Cincinnati (correct)
Denver over Jacksonville (wrong)
Arizona over Dallas (correct)
Philadelphia over San Francisco (correct)
Green Bay over Seattle (correct)
San Diego over New England (correct)
NY Giants/38 over Cleveland/13 (wrong)
This week: 10-4
Last week: 8-6
Season: 57-31 (.648)
Atlanta over Chicago (correct)
Carolina over Tampa (wrong)
Washington over St. Louis (wrong)
Houston over Miami (correct)
Indianapolis over Baltimore (correct)
Minnesota over Detroit (correct)
New Orleans over Oakland (correct)
NY Jets over Cincinnati (correct)
Denver over Jacksonville (wrong)
Arizona over Dallas (correct)
Philadelphia over San Francisco (correct)
Green Bay over Seattle (correct)
San Diego over New England (correct)
NY Giants/38 over Cleveland/13 (wrong)
This week: 10-4
Last week: 8-6
Season: 57-31 (.648)
Saturday, October 04, 2008
NFL Week Five: Heads Are Rolling
In this week's edition of The Sandlot (sorry, but teaching 21 credit hours this fall means you get picks guaranteed only, plus bonus rants after Mizzou loses to either a) Nebraska or b) Texas and after Pujols gets screwed out of the MVP because of the retarded unwritten rule that only a player on a playoff team can win the award), we take odds on which NFL head coaches will be next on the chopping block and when they can expect the ax to fall. On with the picks...!
Chicago at Detroit
Now that Matt Millen's gone, Rod Marinelli should go ahead and put his house up for sale. Odds of firing: 85%; timing of firing: end of regular season; Lovie Smith looks safe.
Bears 31, Lions 21 [CHI 34 DET 7]
Atlanta at Green Bay
Atlanta's new coach is so new I can't think of his name; Mike McCarthy's safe in Green Bay because he went "all in" on Aaron Rodgers, who looks like a real NFL QB. Both coaches: safe this year.
Packers 27, Falcons 17 [ATL 27 GB 24]
San Diego at Miami
Miami's coach is hand-picked by Bill Parcells, so I consider him safe this year since that team has no expectation. Norv Turner's toast if the Bolts don't at least make the AFC title game, and even that may not be enough. Turner's firing odds: 60%; timing of firing: after playoff failure.
Chargers 33, Dolphins 20 [MIA 17 SD 10]
Seattle at New York Giants
Seattle's Mike Holmgren has already announced his retirement at the end of this season, so he doesn't count. The Giants will certainly keep Tom Coughlin unless this team has some unforeseen dramatic meltdown, which seems unlikely. Coughlin: safe this season.
Giants 38, Seahawks 14 [NYG 44 SEA 6]
Washington at Philadelphia
Jim Zorn is a first-year coach who shows more than just potential; he could take the Skins back to the Superbowl in a year or two. Andy Reid is an institution in Philadelphia; he will coach this team until he decides to leave—the Eagles' owner has complete faith in him. Both coaches safe this year.
Eagles 27, Skins 24 [WAS 23 PHI 17]
Kansas City at Carolina
I think the Chiefs value stability and recognize that Herm Edwards is rebuilding a very young team. Last week's win over Denver took him off the hot seat. John Fox is probably safe in Carolina, another stable franchise, even if they don't make the playoffs in a much-stronger NFC this year. Edwards: 20% chance of firing after season; Fox: 30% chance of firing if Panthers finish below .500.
Panthers 30, Chiefs 10 [CAR 34 KC 0]
Tennessee at Baltimore
Jeff Fisher's not going anywhere except to wherever they present the "NFL Coach of the Year" award...and just maybe back to the Superbowl. John Harbaugh's a first-year coach with a rookie QB, but he's already exceeding expectations. Both these guys are super-safe.
Titans 23, Ravens 19 [TEN 13 BAL 10]
Indianapolis at Houston
I have a very strong feeling that Tony Dungy will retire after this season, especially if they don't make the playoffs. It may be time for a change in Indy. Tony looks tired, and so does the team. Gary Kubiac probably hasn't had a fair chance to win in Houston, and with the hurricane this year, his job is probably safe. Chance of Dungy fired: none; chance of Dungy retiring: 70%; chance of Kubiac fired: 25%.
Colts 24, Texans 20 [IND 31 HOU 27]
Tampa Bay at Denver
Mike Shanahan's title is "Coach for life" in Denver. Chuckie's safe in Tampa, too, especially since they look like the favorites in the NFC South. Both coaches safe.
Broncos 41, Bucs 33 [DEN 16 TB 13]
Buffalo at Arizona
Dick Jauron has a legitimate chance to dethrone the Patriots in the AFC East. He looks safe...duh! Ken Whisenhunt has Arizona on the rise--at least offensively--but never underestimate the chances of the Bidwell's stupidly firing a good head coach. Jauron: safe. Whisenhunt: 15% chance of firing if Arizona misses playoffs.
Cardinals 34, Bills 27 [ARZ 41 BUF 17]
New England at San Francisco
Who is the head coach in Frisco now? I honestly can't think of the guy. Whoever he is, he ought to be kissing Mike Martz's big white butt with serious enthusiasm, because Martz's offense has made the Niners potentially relevant again. I guess that Belichick guy's probably safe, too, ya think? Niners' anonymous coach: 10% chance of being fired and replaced with Mike Martz. Belichick: -5000% chance of ever being fired again.
49ers 31, Patriots 17 [NE 30 SF 21]
p.s. I looked it up; his name is Mike Nolan. Oh, yeah.
Cincinnati at Dallas
This is an interesting game because you have a legitimate Superbowl contender in Dallas and a legitimate train wreck in Cincy, and both of them are highly likely to jettison their head coaches. Win or lose, I think Wade Phillips will either retire after winning a Superbowl or get fired after failing one more time to please his monomaniacal owner, Jerry Jones. Dallas is moving into a billion dollar new stadium next year, and if Jason Garrett isn't their new head coach, I'll pick the Rams to win the Superbowl next year. As far as Marvin Lewis is concerned, I don't think he'll make it to December. Wade Philllips fired/retired after season: 90% chance; Marvin Lewis fired in-season: 80% chance; after-season: 100% chance.
Cowboys 45, Bengals 16 [DAL 31 CIN 22]
Pittsburgh at Jacksonville
Two young coaches, both of whom aren't going anywhere anytime soon. Both coaches safe.
Jags 27, Steelers 21 [PIT 26 JAX 21]
Minnesota at New Orleans
The reason that the Vikings don't have a quarterback is because Brad Childress convinced himself and the organization that Tarvaris Jackson was ready to be the starting quarterback. The window of opportunity in the NFL is very narrow (see St. Louis, 1999-2002). The Vikings have maybe two years after this one to get to the top before they have to start over. If TJ is not the answer, then Childress has to pay the price. Then again, these are the Vikings. Chances Childress gets fired: 20%; How much Childress deserves to be fired: 95%; New Orleans' Sean Payton looks safe this year.
Saints 20, Vikings 9 [MIN 30 NO 27]
This week: 8-6
Last week: 9-4
Season: 47-27 (.635)
Chicago at Detroit
Now that Matt Millen's gone, Rod Marinelli should go ahead and put his house up for sale. Odds of firing: 85%; timing of firing: end of regular season; Lovie Smith looks safe.
Bears 31, Lions 21 [CHI 34 DET 7]
Atlanta at Green Bay
Atlanta's new coach is so new I can't think of his name; Mike McCarthy's safe in Green Bay because he went "all in" on Aaron Rodgers, who looks like a real NFL QB. Both coaches: safe this year.
Packers 27, Falcons 17 [ATL 27 GB 24]
San Diego at Miami
Miami's coach is hand-picked by Bill Parcells, so I consider him safe this year since that team has no expectation. Norv Turner's toast if the Bolts don't at least make the AFC title game, and even that may not be enough. Turner's firing odds: 60%; timing of firing: after playoff failure.
Chargers 33, Dolphins 20 [MIA 17 SD 10]
Seattle at New York Giants
Seattle's Mike Holmgren has already announced his retirement at the end of this season, so he doesn't count. The Giants will certainly keep Tom Coughlin unless this team has some unforeseen dramatic meltdown, which seems unlikely. Coughlin: safe this season.
Giants 38, Seahawks 14 [NYG 44 SEA 6]
Washington at Philadelphia
Jim Zorn is a first-year coach who shows more than just potential; he could take the Skins back to the Superbowl in a year or two. Andy Reid is an institution in Philadelphia; he will coach this team until he decides to leave—the Eagles' owner has complete faith in him. Both coaches safe this year.
Eagles 27, Skins 24 [WAS 23 PHI 17]
Kansas City at Carolina
I think the Chiefs value stability and recognize that Herm Edwards is rebuilding a very young team. Last week's win over Denver took him off the hot seat. John Fox is probably safe in Carolina, another stable franchise, even if they don't make the playoffs in a much-stronger NFC this year. Edwards: 20% chance of firing after season; Fox: 30% chance of firing if Panthers finish below .500.
Panthers 30, Chiefs 10 [CAR 34 KC 0]
Tennessee at Baltimore
Jeff Fisher's not going anywhere except to wherever they present the "NFL Coach of the Year" award...and just maybe back to the Superbowl. John Harbaugh's a first-year coach with a rookie QB, but he's already exceeding expectations. Both these guys are super-safe.
Titans 23, Ravens 19 [TEN 13 BAL 10]
Indianapolis at Houston
I have a very strong feeling that Tony Dungy will retire after this season, especially if they don't make the playoffs. It may be time for a change in Indy. Tony looks tired, and so does the team. Gary Kubiac probably hasn't had a fair chance to win in Houston, and with the hurricane this year, his job is probably safe. Chance of Dungy fired: none; chance of Dungy retiring: 70%; chance of Kubiac fired: 25%.
Colts 24, Texans 20 [IND 31 HOU 27]
Tampa Bay at Denver
Mike Shanahan's title is "Coach for life" in Denver. Chuckie's safe in Tampa, too, especially since they look like the favorites in the NFC South. Both coaches safe.
Broncos 41, Bucs 33 [DEN 16 TB 13]
Buffalo at Arizona
Dick Jauron has a legitimate chance to dethrone the Patriots in the AFC East. He looks safe...duh! Ken Whisenhunt has Arizona on the rise--at least offensively--but never underestimate the chances of the Bidwell's stupidly firing a good head coach. Jauron: safe. Whisenhunt: 15% chance of firing if Arizona misses playoffs.
Cardinals 34, Bills 27 [ARZ 41 BUF 17]
New England at San Francisco
Who is the head coach in Frisco now? I honestly can't think of the guy. Whoever he is, he ought to be kissing Mike Martz's big white butt with serious enthusiasm, because Martz's offense has made the Niners potentially relevant again. I guess that Belichick guy's probably safe, too, ya think? Niners' anonymous coach: 10% chance of being fired and replaced with Mike Martz. Belichick: -5000% chance of ever being fired again.
49ers 31, Patriots 17 [NE 30 SF 21]
p.s. I looked it up; his name is Mike Nolan. Oh, yeah.
Cincinnati at Dallas
This is an interesting game because you have a legitimate Superbowl contender in Dallas and a legitimate train wreck in Cincy, and both of them are highly likely to jettison their head coaches. Win or lose, I think Wade Phillips will either retire after winning a Superbowl or get fired after failing one more time to please his monomaniacal owner, Jerry Jones. Dallas is moving into a billion dollar new stadium next year, and if Jason Garrett isn't their new head coach, I'll pick the Rams to win the Superbowl next year. As far as Marvin Lewis is concerned, I don't think he'll make it to December. Wade Philllips fired/retired after season: 90% chance; Marvin Lewis fired in-season: 80% chance; after-season: 100% chance.
Cowboys 45, Bengals 16 [DAL 31 CIN 22]
Pittsburgh at Jacksonville
Two young coaches, both of whom aren't going anywhere anytime soon. Both coaches safe.
Jags 27, Steelers 21 [PIT 26 JAX 21]
Minnesota at New Orleans
The reason that the Vikings don't have a quarterback is because Brad Childress convinced himself and the organization that Tarvaris Jackson was ready to be the starting quarterback. The window of opportunity in the NFL is very narrow (see St. Louis, 1999-2002). The Vikings have maybe two years after this one to get to the top before they have to start over. If TJ is not the answer, then Childress has to pay the price. Then again, these are the Vikings. Chances Childress gets fired: 20%; How much Childress deserves to be fired: 95%; New Orleans' Sean Payton looks safe this year.
Saints 20, Vikings 9 [MIN 30 NO 27]
This week: 8-6
Last week: 9-4
Season: 47-27 (.635)
Saturday, September 27, 2008
NFL Week Four Picks—I'm back in the game! (updated with results)
After a dismal week three, I opted for mainly home cookin' last week, and I upped my percentage (now up yours) to .638--take that, experts! This looks like a boring week in the NFL, with the first round of byes, good teams gone bad and boring matchups abounding. Hope the NFL's not as upset-happy as the NCAA was this week; Mizzou better be grateful they had a bye, because most of the rest of the top 10 got beat. On with the picks!
Cleveland at Cincinnati
Even Ohio's tuning this game out. Since they both stink on ice, I'm going with the home team, who at least tried to win on the road against the Giants last week. But that doesn't mean I care.
Bengals 21, Browns 13 [CLE 20 CIN 12]
Minnesota at Tennessee
Yeah, I'm definitely not feeling the Gus Frerotte magic against the NFL's best head coach.
Titans 20, Vikings 7 [TEN 30 MIN 17]
Denver at Kansas City
If the NFL had a mercy rule, this one would be over at halftime.
Broncos 44, Chiefs 20 [KC 33 DEN 19]
San Francisco at New Orleans
Sure, New Orleans has no defense, but Frisco's gonna have to show me a road win in a tough venue before I'm volunteering to drink this Kool-Aid. Plus, Mike Martz never wins in the Big Easy.
Saints 27, 49ers 24 [NO 31 SF 17]
Arizona at New York Jets
Flip a coin. Yes, the Jets stink, but I hate Arizona on the road, despite my Warner for MVP campaign. Like the Niners, the Gridbirds gotta show me the money before I show them the love.
Jets 26, Cardinals 19 [NYJ 56 ARZ 35]
Green Bay at Tampa Bay
Well, it looks like Tampa is my pick kryptonite this year, so since I like the Packers, I'm picking the Bucs.
Bucs 31, Packers 27 [TB 30 GB 21]
Atlanta at Carolina
I'm thinking the Matt Ryan rookie year pattern is win, lose, win, lose...so this week, he's due for a loss.
Panthers 37, Falcons 23 [CAR 24 ATL 9]
Houston at Jacksonville
Jags got a huge lift with a big win at hopelessly diminished Indy last week. No way they're gonna roll over for the Moo Cows.
Jags 24, Texans 10 [JAX 30 HOU 27]
San Diego at Oakland
If Lane Kiffin is looking for a temp job after this week, there ought to be an opening in St. Louis. It couldn't possibly be worse than working for Al Davis.
Chargers 35, Raiders 17 [SD 28 OAK 18]
Buffalo at St. Louis
If St. Louis had gotten an expansion team instead of Jacksonville, they would have called them the Stallions. If the Rams were the Stallions, I could say, "They shoot horses, don't they?" At least in this case, they should.
Bills 41, Lambs 10 [BUF 31 STL 14]
Washington at Dallas
With all due respect to my loyal Steelers readers...Ladies and gentlemen, your 2008 Superbowl Champions: The Dallas Cowboys!
Cowboys 39, Skins 27 [WAS 26 DAL 24]
Philadelphia at Chicago
I don't like the Bears bumbling offense against the nastiest defense in the league, even at home.
Eagles 24, Bears 13 [CHI 24 PHI 20]
Baltimore at Pittsburgh
I don't care who's hurt and how bad, there's no way Pittsburgh is going to lose a division game at home on Monday night.
Steelers 17, Ravens 13 [PIT 23 BAL 20]
This week: 9-4
Last week: 12-4
Season: 39-21 (.650)
Cleveland at Cincinnati
Even Ohio's tuning this game out. Since they both stink on ice, I'm going with the home team, who at least tried to win on the road against the Giants last week. But that doesn't mean I care.
Bengals 21, Browns 13 [CLE 20 CIN 12]
Minnesota at Tennessee
Yeah, I'm definitely not feeling the Gus Frerotte magic against the NFL's best head coach.
Titans 20, Vikings 7 [TEN 30 MIN 17]
Denver at Kansas City
If the NFL had a mercy rule, this one would be over at halftime.
Broncos 44, Chiefs 20 [KC 33 DEN 19]
San Francisco at New Orleans
Sure, New Orleans has no defense, but Frisco's gonna have to show me a road win in a tough venue before I'm volunteering to drink this Kool-Aid. Plus, Mike Martz never wins in the Big Easy.
Saints 27, 49ers 24 [NO 31 SF 17]
Arizona at New York Jets
Flip a coin. Yes, the Jets stink, but I hate Arizona on the road, despite my Warner for MVP campaign. Like the Niners, the Gridbirds gotta show me the money before I show them the love.
Jets 26, Cardinals 19 [NYJ 56 ARZ 35]
Green Bay at Tampa Bay
Well, it looks like Tampa is my pick kryptonite this year, so since I like the Packers, I'm picking the Bucs.
Bucs 31, Packers 27 [TB 30 GB 21]
Atlanta at Carolina
I'm thinking the Matt Ryan rookie year pattern is win, lose, win, lose...so this week, he's due for a loss.
Panthers 37, Falcons 23 [CAR 24 ATL 9]
Houston at Jacksonville
Jags got a huge lift with a big win at hopelessly diminished Indy last week. No way they're gonna roll over for the Moo Cows.
Jags 24, Texans 10 [JAX 30 HOU 27]
San Diego at Oakland
If Lane Kiffin is looking for a temp job after this week, there ought to be an opening in St. Louis. It couldn't possibly be worse than working for Al Davis.
Chargers 35, Raiders 17 [SD 28 OAK 18]
Buffalo at St. Louis
If St. Louis had gotten an expansion team instead of Jacksonville, they would have called them the Stallions. If the Rams were the Stallions, I could say, "They shoot horses, don't they?" At least in this case, they should.
Bills 41, Lambs 10 [BUF 31 STL 14]
Washington at Dallas
With all due respect to my loyal Steelers readers...Ladies and gentlemen, your 2008 Superbowl Champions: The Dallas Cowboys!
Cowboys 39, Skins 27 [WAS 26 DAL 24]
Philadelphia at Chicago
I don't like the Bears bumbling offense against the nastiest defense in the league, even at home.
Eagles 24, Bears 13 [CHI 24 PHI 20]
Baltimore at Pittsburgh
I don't care who's hurt and how bad, there's no way Pittsburgh is going to lose a division game at home on Monday night.
Steelers 17, Ravens 13 [PIT 23 BAL 20]
This week: 9-4
Last week: 12-4
Season: 39-21 (.650)
Friday, September 19, 2008
NFL Week Three Picks (updated)
I got killed last week thanks to a bunch of stupid late-game comebacks. Looks like lots of home team winners this week. Well, let's roll the dice.
Kansas City at Atlanta
So, which is the worst franchise in Missouri?
Falcons 27, Chiefs 6 [ATL 38 KC 14]
Oakland at Buffalo
The Bills resurgence continues. How long until we see Jim Kelly and Thurman Thomas up in the press box with Marv Levy. Let's party like it's 1995, baby!
Bills 35, Raiders 17 [BUF 24 OAK 23]
Tampa Bay at Chicago
Brian Griese has shown that he can't win in Chicago. Look for Lovie to be more aggressive with the offense in the second half to avoid another late loss.
Bears 23, Bucs 20 [TB 27 CHI 24]
Houston at Tennessee
The Titans are on a roll now with Kerry Collins providing stable leadership, while the Texans, like the Astros (now in free-fall), are a team without a city.
Titans 30, Texans 13 [TEN 31 HOU 12]
Carolina at Minnesota
Gus Frerotte at QB? Adrian Peterson injured? Panthers on a roll? Everything points to a sure-fire Carolina win, which is why they will lose. Remember, the Panthers are this year's pick kryptonite (win when they should lose, lose when they should win).
Vikings 24, Panthers 21 [MIN 20 CAR 10]
Miami at New England
The Matt Cassell era continues! In retrospect, Bill Parcells will be sorry for turning down Arthur Blank and the Falcons. The football gods will punish him and the Fish this year for his two-timing ways.
Patriots 31, Dolphins 10 [MIA 38 NE 13]
Cincinnati at New York Giants
Another big win for the defending champs, still playing like champs. Meanwhile, Marvin Lewis is still cashing paychecks.
Giants 38, Bengals 7 [NYG 26 CIN 23]
Arizona at Washington
Kurt Warner, MVP. This year. I mean it.
Cardinals 28, Skins 24 [WAS 24 ARZ 17]
New Orleans at Denver
Mike Shanahan, coach of the year.
Broncos 33, Saints 23 [DEN 34 NO 32]
Detroit at San Francisco
I think Mike Martz will unleash every trick in his arsenal to crush the team that was so inept they couldn't run his genius offense. Why does Matt Millen still work in the NFL? He's so incompetant, he should be part of Pres. Bush's economic team.
49ers 41, Lions 27 [SF 31 DET 13]
St. Louis at Seattle
The end of Scott Linehan (not his fault) and hopefully, GM Jay Zygmunt (all his fault).
Seahawks 31, Rams 20 [SEA 37 STL 13]
Cleveland at Baltimore
I think a well-rested Ravens team will handle the tired and already beaten-up Browns in a typical AFC North snoozefest.
Ravens 17, Browns 13 [BAL 28 CLE 10]
Pittsburgh at Philadelphia
When one team only scores 10 against a team that gave up 28 to the team that gave up 38 to the team they're playing this week, and that team has an injured QB...I'm not saying, I'm just saying.
Eagles 34, Steelers 27 [PHI 15 PIT 6]
Jacksonville at Indianapolis
They should call last week's fourth quarter at Minnesota "How Peyton Got His Groove Back." Besides that, Indy simply OWNS the Jags, even last year when the Jags were good. Everyone on TV talks about how "physical" the Jags are, and how they "punched" Indy in the mouth. Uhh, guys, whydontcha check those final scores, eh?
Colts 29, Jags 16 [JAX 23 IND 21]
Dallas at Green Bay
Okay, here's the deal. Green Bay just barely squeaked by Minnesota at home, and the Vikings have no freaking offense whatsoever (yes, Peterson is great, but no one can run against 11 in the box, for Pete's sake). Meanwhile, Dallas just hung 41 on the great Philly defense. Aaron Rodgers, welcome to reality...it's called your first loss as a starter.
Cowboys 35, Packers 27 [DAL 27 GB 16]
New York Jets at San Diego
Stay unlucky, San Diego. They need to stop whining about last week and go take care of business. Mangini, in the meantime, seems to have forgotten that this Favre guy can kind of throw the ball a little bit.
Chargers 34, Jets 20 [SD 48 NYJ 29]
This week: 12-4
Last week: 8-7
Season: 30-17 (.638)
Kansas City at Atlanta
So, which is the worst franchise in Missouri?
Falcons 27, Chiefs 6 [ATL 38 KC 14]
Oakland at Buffalo
The Bills resurgence continues. How long until we see Jim Kelly and Thurman Thomas up in the press box with Marv Levy. Let's party like it's 1995, baby!
Bills 35, Raiders 17 [BUF 24 OAK 23]
Tampa Bay at Chicago
Brian Griese has shown that he can't win in Chicago. Look for Lovie to be more aggressive with the offense in the second half to avoid another late loss.
Bears 23, Bucs 20 [TB 27 CHI 24]
Houston at Tennessee
The Titans are on a roll now with Kerry Collins providing stable leadership, while the Texans, like the Astros (now in free-fall), are a team without a city.
Titans 30, Texans 13 [TEN 31 HOU 12]
Carolina at Minnesota
Gus Frerotte at QB? Adrian Peterson injured? Panthers on a roll? Everything points to a sure-fire Carolina win, which is why they will lose. Remember, the Panthers are this year's pick kryptonite (win when they should lose, lose when they should win).
Vikings 24, Panthers 21 [MIN 20 CAR 10]
Miami at New England
The Matt Cassell era continues! In retrospect, Bill Parcells will be sorry for turning down Arthur Blank and the Falcons. The football gods will punish him and the Fish this year for his two-timing ways.
Patriots 31, Dolphins 10 [MIA 38 NE 13]
Cincinnati at New York Giants
Another big win for the defending champs, still playing like champs. Meanwhile, Marvin Lewis is still cashing paychecks.
Giants 38, Bengals 7 [NYG 26 CIN 23]
Arizona at Washington
Kurt Warner, MVP. This year. I mean it.
Cardinals 28, Skins 24 [WAS 24 ARZ 17]
New Orleans at Denver
Mike Shanahan, coach of the year.
Broncos 33, Saints 23 [DEN 34 NO 32]
Detroit at San Francisco
I think Mike Martz will unleash every trick in his arsenal to crush the team that was so inept they couldn't run his genius offense. Why does Matt Millen still work in the NFL? He's so incompetant, he should be part of Pres. Bush's economic team.
49ers 41, Lions 27 [SF 31 DET 13]
St. Louis at Seattle
The end of Scott Linehan (not his fault) and hopefully, GM Jay Zygmunt (all his fault).
Seahawks 31, Rams 20 [SEA 37 STL 13]
Cleveland at Baltimore
I think a well-rested Ravens team will handle the tired and already beaten-up Browns in a typical AFC North snoozefest.
Ravens 17, Browns 13 [BAL 28 CLE 10]
Pittsburgh at Philadelphia
When one team only scores 10 against a team that gave up 28 to the team that gave up 38 to the team they're playing this week, and that team has an injured QB...I'm not saying, I'm just saying.
Eagles 34, Steelers 27 [PHI 15 PIT 6]
Jacksonville at Indianapolis
They should call last week's fourth quarter at Minnesota "How Peyton Got His Groove Back." Besides that, Indy simply OWNS the Jags, even last year when the Jags were good. Everyone on TV talks about how "physical" the Jags are, and how they "punched" Indy in the mouth. Uhh, guys, whydontcha check those final scores, eh?
Colts 29, Jags 16 [JAX 23 IND 21]
Dallas at Green Bay
Okay, here's the deal. Green Bay just barely squeaked by Minnesota at home, and the Vikings have no freaking offense whatsoever (yes, Peterson is great, but no one can run against 11 in the box, for Pete's sake). Meanwhile, Dallas just hung 41 on the great Philly defense. Aaron Rodgers, welcome to reality...it's called your first loss as a starter.
Cowboys 35, Packers 27 [DAL 27 GB 16]
New York Jets at San Diego
Stay unlucky, San Diego. They need to stop whining about last week and go take care of business. Mangini, in the meantime, seems to have forgotten that this Favre guy can kind of throw the ball a little bit.
Chargers 34, Jets 20 [SD 48 NYJ 29]
This week: 12-4
Last week: 8-7
Season: 30-17 (.638)
Friday, September 12, 2008
NFL Week Two Picks (updated with comments)
I was feeling really good about myself last week around 3:30 p.m. Then San Diego blew up at the end, Indy choked against Chicago, TJ threw that late interception and Oakland reminded us why they've been so bad for so many years. Ten and six isn't terrible for Week One, but I have higher standards than that. Let's see if last week's performances are actually indicative of this week's results. On with the picks!
Tennessee at Cincinnati
I honestly think that the Bengals team has completely checked out on Marvin Lewis. This is a team that, like St. Louis, needs a clean sweep from the president's office to the janitor's closet. In the meantime, the AFC's meanest defense should pick up where Baltimore left off last week. Kerry Collins is more than capable as Vince Young's stand-in; he could end up just being his replacement.
Titans 24, Bengals 7 [TEN 24 CIN 7]
Perfect! As I expected, Collins has been named QB from here on out.
New Orleans at Washington
The Saints are once again finding their rhythm on offense, while Jason Campbell struggles to learn another system. Someone needs to tell Dan Snyder that turning over a pro staff every two or three years is a sure-fire recipe for the kind of mediocre football we expect from D.C., where mediocre means you get to serve as leader of the free world.
Saints 30, Skins 20 [WAS 29 NO 24]
Saints have no defense, and Jason Campbell looked much better this week.
Chicago at Carolina
I don't think the Sunday night game was a fluke. I've always though Orton was a better choice at QB than Grossman. Factor in Forte as the featured running back and a healthy Brian Urlacher--my choice right now for defense player of this century--and the Bears are lurking as a potential NFC power again. I don't believe in Carolina, despite what they did in San Diego, because it's clear San Diego was a one-year wonder. That's Norv Turner for you.
Bears 27, Panthers 23 [CAR 20 CHI 17]
How in the world does the Bears defense blow a 17-3 lead. Guh!
Buffalo at Jacksonville
The Bills are a team with no expectations on the rise; the Jaguars are a team with high expectations but not enough talent to fulfill them. Everyone thought bringing Marv Levy back to the front office was a huge mistake, but he's been the architect of successful football in Buffalo before. Besides, I hate Jacksonville. They're my anti-Vikings; I always pick against them.
Bills 21, Jags 17 [BUF 20 JAX 16]
I hate being right all the time, but I said Buffalo would be up and Jax would be down this year.
Green Bay at Detroit
Okay, so Aaron Rodgers played well. Did anyone think he wouldn't? He's been studying under Brett Farve for three years, he was a highly skilled and successful D1 college QB, and the Packers staff gave him a game plan that George W. Bush couldn't screw up. Expect more of the same this week against one of the five worst organizations in the NFL.
Packers 38, Lions 10 [GB 48 DET 25]
Anyone can rock Detroit; let's see how they look next week against Dallas.
Oakland at Kansas City
I'm so old, I remember when this game used to matter.
Chiefs 24, Raiders 7 [OAK 23 KC 8]
Why is Lane Kiffin about to be fired while Herm Edwards is secure?
New York Giants at St. Louis
If the G-Men throw a shutout, can we expect Linehan's resignation next week? No, that would make too much sense. Like Cincinnati, every executive and coach on this team needs to be fired. I'm beginning to wonder if the Rams are doing to St. Louis what they did to Anaheim--suck on purpose to the point where what's left of the fan base doesn't care when they leave. I'm just about there with this perpetually inept regime. This team is just embarrassing.
Giants 41, Rams 0 [NYG 41 STL 13]
A big loss at Seattle will be the end of this inept team. Let's hope so.
Indianapolis at Minnesota
This is like two of my kids coming to me and asking which one I love the best. "Gosh, Minny, I've loved you for almost 30 years, but you've disappointed me so many times. Even so, I've never given up hope for you. And Indy, you've only been with me for a decade, but you've made me so proud with your success. But it seems like you're getting older, and you don't have the same drive to succeed you once did. Aw shucks, it doesn't matter that neither of you will win it all this year. I still love you both. It's just that this week, I love Minny a little bit more."
Vikings 28, Colts 17 [IND 18 MIN 15]
This just in: Gus Frerotte replaces Tarvaris Jackson at QB for rest of season. Hey Vikes: give Daunte Culpepper a call, wouldja?
San Francisco at Seattle
The "I HATE YOUR FREAKING GUTS" bowl. Nice.
Seahawks 17, 49ers 7 [SF 33 SEA 30]
Guess Mike Martz still has some genius in him, eh?
Atlanta at Tampa Bay
Tampa's another misfire on my preseason radar. I forgot to read the carbon-14 dating tests on prehistoric QB Jeff Garcia. Now the Bucs' season is in the hands of Brian Griese, a QB so inept that the Chicago Bears released him. That's right--he's not good enough to play QB for Chicago. This game's all about the running backs, so I'm going with the guy who gained an eighth of a mile last week.
Falcons 31, Bucs 19 [TB 24 ATL 9]
I'm so stupid; rookie QBs never have two good games in a row. Dur!
New England at New York Jets
J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE!
Hey, remember that scene in the classic Prince movie "Purple Rain" where Prince's dad shoots himself in the head, then the next night in the club, Morris Day walks up to Prince and says, "How's the family"? Think Mangini walks up to Belichick and asks, "How's your QB?" ROTFLMFAO!!!
Jets 27, Patriots 13 [NE 19 NYJ 10]
Oh, that Bill Belichick. Sorry, my bad.
Miami at Arizona
I'm feeling it's Kurt Warner's year, y'all. I'm feelin' it big time.
Cardinals 34, Dolphins 16 [ARI 31 MIA 10]
Kurt Warner, MVP 2008; is he legit Hall of Fame candidate if that happens?
San Diego at Denver
Okay, okay, Cutler's the real deal. Even the Eastcoast Sports Promotion Network gets one right every once in awhile. I think Norv Turner loses his job if the Chargers miss the playoffs this year. I also think Mike Shanahan is the most overlooked coach in the league. Did you know he's been in Denver for 14 years? Amazing! That's like 50 years for a normal job.
Broncos 38, Chargers 20 [DEN 39 SD 38]
Stay whiny, San Diego. If you could play "D" the ref wouldn't be an issue.
Pittsburgh at Cleveland
Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2008 Superbowl Champions!
Steelers 41, Browns 16 [PIT 10 CLE 6]
What a boring game this was. I fell asleep...literally.
Baltimore at Houston
Bill "Sports Guy" Simmons wants to nickname Joe Flacco "The Chef." I'm good with that. "The Chef is really cookin' tonight in Houston!"
Ravens 24, Texans 14 [game postponed]
Philadelphia at Dallas
Something very strange has happened to me--I like the Dallas Cowboys. No, seriously, I like watching this team. I like Romo, I like T.O. (loved the sprint start celebration), I really like Marion "the Barbarian" Barber, I like Wade Phillips, I even like Jerry Jones and his freaky E.T. facelift. I like Donovan McNabb too, but I don't like Philadelphia. With a fan base that surly and miserable, it's just hard to be on their side. They're like Chicago Cubs fans--you just want to keep them miserable because they'd never really enjoy success; they'd just compare it to their previous lifetime of misery. And yes, I know from experience, Vikings fans are the same way. So, in case you missed it, I've fastened my seat belt on the Dallas bandwagon this year.
Cowboys 31, Eagles 27 [DAL 41 PHI 37]
Best Monday night game I've seen in years. This is why the NFL is the greatest sport on earth.
This week: 8-7
Last week: 10-6
Season: 18-13 (.580)
Tennessee at Cincinnati
I honestly think that the Bengals team has completely checked out on Marvin Lewis. This is a team that, like St. Louis, needs a clean sweep from the president's office to the janitor's closet. In the meantime, the AFC's meanest defense should pick up where Baltimore left off last week. Kerry Collins is more than capable as Vince Young's stand-in; he could end up just being his replacement.
Titans 24, Bengals 7 [TEN 24 CIN 7]
Perfect! As I expected, Collins has been named QB from here on out.
New Orleans at Washington
The Saints are once again finding their rhythm on offense, while Jason Campbell struggles to learn another system. Someone needs to tell Dan Snyder that turning over a pro staff every two or three years is a sure-fire recipe for the kind of mediocre football we expect from D.C., where mediocre means you get to serve as leader of the free world.
Saints 30, Skins 20 [WAS 29 NO 24]
Saints have no defense, and Jason Campbell looked much better this week.
Chicago at Carolina
I don't think the Sunday night game was a fluke. I've always though Orton was a better choice at QB than Grossman. Factor in Forte as the featured running back and a healthy Brian Urlacher--my choice right now for defense player of this century--and the Bears are lurking as a potential NFC power again. I don't believe in Carolina, despite what they did in San Diego, because it's clear San Diego was a one-year wonder. That's Norv Turner for you.
Bears 27, Panthers 23 [CAR 20 CHI 17]
How in the world does the Bears defense blow a 17-3 lead. Guh!
Buffalo at Jacksonville
The Bills are a team with no expectations on the rise; the Jaguars are a team with high expectations but not enough talent to fulfill them. Everyone thought bringing Marv Levy back to the front office was a huge mistake, but he's been the architect of successful football in Buffalo before. Besides, I hate Jacksonville. They're my anti-Vikings; I always pick against them.
Bills 21, Jags 17 [BUF 20 JAX 16]
I hate being right all the time, but I said Buffalo would be up and Jax would be down this year.
Green Bay at Detroit
Okay, so Aaron Rodgers played well. Did anyone think he wouldn't? He's been studying under Brett Farve for three years, he was a highly skilled and successful D1 college QB, and the Packers staff gave him a game plan that George W. Bush couldn't screw up. Expect more of the same this week against one of the five worst organizations in the NFL.
Packers 38, Lions 10 [GB 48 DET 25]
Anyone can rock Detroit; let's see how they look next week against Dallas.
Oakland at Kansas City
I'm so old, I remember when this game used to matter.
Chiefs 24, Raiders 7 [OAK 23 KC 8]
Why is Lane Kiffin about to be fired while Herm Edwards is secure?
New York Giants at St. Louis
If the G-Men throw a shutout, can we expect Linehan's resignation next week? No, that would make too much sense. Like Cincinnati, every executive and coach on this team needs to be fired. I'm beginning to wonder if the Rams are doing to St. Louis what they did to Anaheim--suck on purpose to the point where what's left of the fan base doesn't care when they leave. I'm just about there with this perpetually inept regime. This team is just embarrassing.
Giants 41, Rams 0 [NYG 41 STL 13]
A big loss at Seattle will be the end of this inept team. Let's hope so.
Indianapolis at Minnesota
This is like two of my kids coming to me and asking which one I love the best. "Gosh, Minny, I've loved you for almost 30 years, but you've disappointed me so many times. Even so, I've never given up hope for you. And Indy, you've only been with me for a decade, but you've made me so proud with your success. But it seems like you're getting older, and you don't have the same drive to succeed you once did. Aw shucks, it doesn't matter that neither of you will win it all this year. I still love you both. It's just that this week, I love Minny a little bit more."
Vikings 28, Colts 17 [IND 18 MIN 15]
This just in: Gus Frerotte replaces Tarvaris Jackson at QB for rest of season. Hey Vikes: give Daunte Culpepper a call, wouldja?
San Francisco at Seattle
The "I HATE YOUR FREAKING GUTS" bowl. Nice.
Seahawks 17, 49ers 7 [SF 33 SEA 30]
Guess Mike Martz still has some genius in him, eh?
Atlanta at Tampa Bay
Tampa's another misfire on my preseason radar. I forgot to read the carbon-14 dating tests on prehistoric QB Jeff Garcia. Now the Bucs' season is in the hands of Brian Griese, a QB so inept that the Chicago Bears released him. That's right--he's not good enough to play QB for Chicago. This game's all about the running backs, so I'm going with the guy who gained an eighth of a mile last week.
Falcons 31, Bucs 19 [TB 24 ATL 9]
I'm so stupid; rookie QBs never have two good games in a row. Dur!
New England at New York Jets
J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE! J-E-T-SPYGATE!
Hey, remember that scene in the classic Prince movie "Purple Rain" where Prince's dad shoots himself in the head, then the next night in the club, Morris Day walks up to Prince and says, "How's the family"? Think Mangini walks up to Belichick and asks, "How's your QB?" ROTFLMFAO!!!
Jets 27, Patriots 13 [NE 19 NYJ 10]
Oh, that Bill Belichick. Sorry, my bad.
Miami at Arizona
I'm feeling it's Kurt Warner's year, y'all. I'm feelin' it big time.
Cardinals 34, Dolphins 16 [ARI 31 MIA 10]
Kurt Warner, MVP 2008; is he legit Hall of Fame candidate if that happens?
San Diego at Denver
Okay, okay, Cutler's the real deal. Even the Eastcoast Sports Promotion Network gets one right every once in awhile. I think Norv Turner loses his job if the Chargers miss the playoffs this year. I also think Mike Shanahan is the most overlooked coach in the league. Did you know he's been in Denver for 14 years? Amazing! That's like 50 years for a normal job.
Broncos 38, Chargers 20 [DEN 39 SD 38]
Stay whiny, San Diego. If you could play "D" the ref wouldn't be an issue.
Pittsburgh at Cleveland
Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2008 Superbowl Champions!
Steelers 41, Browns 16 [PIT 10 CLE 6]
What a boring game this was. I fell asleep...literally.
Baltimore at Houston
Bill "Sports Guy" Simmons wants to nickname Joe Flacco "The Chef." I'm good with that. "The Chef is really cookin' tonight in Houston!"
Ravens 24, Texans 14 [game postponed]
Philadelphia at Dallas
Something very strange has happened to me--I like the Dallas Cowboys. No, seriously, I like watching this team. I like Romo, I like T.O. (loved the sprint start celebration), I really like Marion "the Barbarian" Barber, I like Wade Phillips, I even like Jerry Jones and his freaky E.T. facelift. I like Donovan McNabb too, but I don't like Philadelphia. With a fan base that surly and miserable, it's just hard to be on their side. They're like Chicago Cubs fans--you just want to keep them miserable because they'd never really enjoy success; they'd just compare it to their previous lifetime of misery. And yes, I know from experience, Vikings fans are the same way. So, in case you missed it, I've fastened my seat belt on the Dallas bandwagon this year.
Cowboys 31, Eagles 27 [DAL 41 PHI 37]
Best Monday night game I've seen in years. This is why the NFL is the greatest sport on earth.
This week: 8-7
Last week: 10-6
Season: 18-13 (.580)
Sunday, September 07, 2008
NFL Picks, Week One (updated 9/9/08)
Remember, you can join "The Sandlot" group at espn.com's "Pigskin Pick'em" game—it's free and fun, so click on the link to the left to get started. On with the picks for Sunday; I already took the Giants over the Redskins, so I'm 1-0 to start.
Updated Tuesday with scores and comments! Week One is always the toughest because preseason doesn't give you a real sense of what the teams will look like. I got off to a good start and then ate a bucket of worms Sunday and Monday nights. I'll get back in stride next week. In the meantime, let's review...
Detroit at Atlanta
The car wreck meets the 18-car interstate pile-up.
Lions 24, Falcons 6 [ATL 34 DET 21]
Who knew about Matt Ryan and Michael Turner? There's life in Atlanta, and Detroit is horrible again.
Seattle at Buffalo
The Bills are my kryptonite; if I pick them to win they lose, if I pick them to lose they win. It's infuriating. Having said that, I don't like Seattle at all this year, and I think Buffalo will be tough at home.
Bills 20, Seahawks 17 [BUF 34 SEA 10]
Not a big surprise, really. Buffalo could be the team to make the move in the AFC East now that Brady's gone.
Jacksonville at Tennessee
The so-called experts are falling all over themselves to anoint Jacksonville as the next big thing. They did that with Carolina a couple of years ago, too, and see how that turned out. Tennessee's defense is downright vicious in Nashville. Watch this game if you liked the movie "Gladiator."
Titans 27, Jaguars 24 [TEN 17 JAX 10]
What's going on with Vince Young? This could be Kerry Collins' team in just a week or two. And does Jeff Fisher have room for Daunte Culpepper on the roster if Vince is gone for the year?
New York Jets at Miami
More stupidity from the so-called experts, taking Chad Pennington and the dismal Miami team over the Brett Favre version of the Jets. What? Have they seen Pennington play before? Or Favre?
Jets 31, Dolphins 10 [NYJ 20 MIA 14]
The Jets made this one too close.
Kansas City at New England
Remember Rocky's first bout against Clubber Lang in "Rocky 3"? Something like that.
Patriots 45, Chiefs 7 [NE 17 KC 10]
I doubt that Matt Cassell is the second coming of Kurt Warner.
Tampa Bay at New Orleans
I think Tampa is going to win the division, but I also think the Saints will give the hometown fans a lift after another rough hurricane experience.
Saints 31, Bucs 27 [NO 24 TB 20]
I wish I could have watched this one instead of the beatdown in Philly.
St. Louis at Philadelphia
I just don't like the Rams, and I think Philly will beat them up at home.
Eagles 37, Rams 17 [PHI 38 STL 3]
If the Rams did move away from St. Louis, would anyone care? They may have sunk to the position of worst franchise in the league. If Linehan lasts until Halloween, I'll be shocked.
Houston at Pittsburgh
Houston is another team the s.c.e. like as a "sleeper." Well, I think they "suck."
Steelers 35, Texans 14 [PIT 38 HOU 17]
Ladies and Gentlemen, your Superbowl champs for 2008: the Pittsburgh Steelers.
Cincinnati at Baltimore
Ocho Cinco trumps rookie QB from Delaware.
Bengals 28, Ravens 13 [BAL 17 CIN 10]
At least the Rams have competition for the cot in the basement. Who will go first, Marvin Lewis or Scott Linehan?
Carolina at San Diego
The Chargers just might go all the way this year. Carolina, as usual, will fall far short.
Chargers 30, Panthers 16 [CAR 26 SD 24]
Carolina, my Buffalo in the NFC. Mark the Chargers down for "done" with NE and Indy.
Arizona at San Francisco
Hey, I'm a Kurt Warner guy. The Rams never should have let him go.
Cardinals 27, 49ers 20 [ARZ 23 SF 13]
QB rating of 94, 200 yards and a TD—how much do the Rams miss Kurt Warner? The Cardinals are going to win the NFC West by default.
Dallas at Cleveland
Tony Romo will be this season's MVP.
Cowboys 41, Browns 24 [DAL 28 CLE 10]
Ladies and Gentlemen, your NFC Champions: the Dallas Cowboys.
Chicago at Indianapolis
Yeah, keep telling yourself Peyton's not 100 percent. Marvin, too. Go ahead.
Colts 38, Bears 9 [CHI 29 IND 13]
Seen Meg Ryan lately. Yeah, that old and that bad. That's the Colts. Didn't see it coming. Sorry.
Minnesota at Green Bay
Aaron Rodgers, meet the NFL's best defense.
Vikings 24, Packers 17 [GB 24 MIN 19]
Vikes were just two plays—botched punt coverage and the TJ pick late—from winning this game. TJ's going to be all right at QB, and the Vikes will bounce back from this. It was a hopeful loss.
Denver at Oakland
Oakland will be much improved this year; don't hate Lane Kiffin because he's young—he's got a strong football pedigree.
Raiders 20, Broncos 17 [DEN 41 OAK 14]
Can I have a mulligan on Oakland? Can we force Al Davis into retirement for the good of the league?
This week: 10-6
Season: 10-6
Average: .667
Updated Tuesday with scores and comments! Week One is always the toughest because preseason doesn't give you a real sense of what the teams will look like. I got off to a good start and then ate a bucket of worms Sunday and Monday nights. I'll get back in stride next week. In the meantime, let's review...
Detroit at Atlanta
The car wreck meets the 18-car interstate pile-up.
Lions 24, Falcons 6 [ATL 34 DET 21]
Who knew about Matt Ryan and Michael Turner? There's life in Atlanta, and Detroit is horrible again.
Seattle at Buffalo
The Bills are my kryptonite; if I pick them to win they lose, if I pick them to lose they win. It's infuriating. Having said that, I don't like Seattle at all this year, and I think Buffalo will be tough at home.
Bills 20, Seahawks 17 [BUF 34 SEA 10]
Not a big surprise, really. Buffalo could be the team to make the move in the AFC East now that Brady's gone.
Jacksonville at Tennessee
The so-called experts are falling all over themselves to anoint Jacksonville as the next big thing. They did that with Carolina a couple of years ago, too, and see how that turned out. Tennessee's defense is downright vicious in Nashville. Watch this game if you liked the movie "Gladiator."
Titans 27, Jaguars 24 [TEN 17 JAX 10]
What's going on with Vince Young? This could be Kerry Collins' team in just a week or two. And does Jeff Fisher have room for Daunte Culpepper on the roster if Vince is gone for the year?
New York Jets at Miami
More stupidity from the so-called experts, taking Chad Pennington and the dismal Miami team over the Brett Favre version of the Jets. What? Have they seen Pennington play before? Or Favre?
Jets 31, Dolphins 10 [NYJ 20 MIA 14]
The Jets made this one too close.
Kansas City at New England
Remember Rocky's first bout against Clubber Lang in "Rocky 3"? Something like that.
Patriots 45, Chiefs 7 [NE 17 KC 10]
I doubt that Matt Cassell is the second coming of Kurt Warner.
Tampa Bay at New Orleans
I think Tampa is going to win the division, but I also think the Saints will give the hometown fans a lift after another rough hurricane experience.
Saints 31, Bucs 27 [NO 24 TB 20]
I wish I could have watched this one instead of the beatdown in Philly.
St. Louis at Philadelphia
I just don't like the Rams, and I think Philly will beat them up at home.
Eagles 37, Rams 17 [PHI 38 STL 3]
If the Rams did move away from St. Louis, would anyone care? They may have sunk to the position of worst franchise in the league. If Linehan lasts until Halloween, I'll be shocked.
Houston at Pittsburgh
Houston is another team the s.c.e. like as a "sleeper." Well, I think they "suck."
Steelers 35, Texans 14 [PIT 38 HOU 17]
Ladies and Gentlemen, your Superbowl champs for 2008: the Pittsburgh Steelers.
Cincinnati at Baltimore
Ocho Cinco trumps rookie QB from Delaware.
Bengals 28, Ravens 13 [BAL 17 CIN 10]
At least the Rams have competition for the cot in the basement. Who will go first, Marvin Lewis or Scott Linehan?
Carolina at San Diego
The Chargers just might go all the way this year. Carolina, as usual, will fall far short.
Chargers 30, Panthers 16 [CAR 26 SD 24]
Carolina, my Buffalo in the NFC. Mark the Chargers down for "done" with NE and Indy.
Arizona at San Francisco
Hey, I'm a Kurt Warner guy. The Rams never should have let him go.
Cardinals 27, 49ers 20 [ARZ 23 SF 13]
QB rating of 94, 200 yards and a TD—how much do the Rams miss Kurt Warner? The Cardinals are going to win the NFC West by default.
Dallas at Cleveland
Tony Romo will be this season's MVP.
Cowboys 41, Browns 24 [DAL 28 CLE 10]
Ladies and Gentlemen, your NFC Champions: the Dallas Cowboys.
Chicago at Indianapolis
Yeah, keep telling yourself Peyton's not 100 percent. Marvin, too. Go ahead.
Colts 38, Bears 9 [CHI 29 IND 13]
Seen Meg Ryan lately. Yeah, that old and that bad. That's the Colts. Didn't see it coming. Sorry.
Minnesota at Green Bay
Aaron Rodgers, meet the NFL's best defense.
Vikings 24, Packers 17 [GB 24 MIN 19]
Vikes were just two plays—botched punt coverage and the TJ pick late—from winning this game. TJ's going to be all right at QB, and the Vikes will bounce back from this. It was a hopeful loss.
Denver at Oakland
Oakland will be much improved this year; don't hate Lane Kiffin because he's young—he's got a strong football pedigree.
Raiders 20, Broncos 17 [DEN 41 OAK 14]
Can I have a mulligan on Oakland? Can we force Al Davis into retirement for the good of the league?
This week: 10-6
Season: 10-6
Average: .667
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Play "Pigskin Pick'em" with The Sandlot, now with season picks!
NFL season starts tonight! Get your picks in! Start here to create your entry:
http://games.espn.go.com/pigskin/frontpage
After you create the entry, join the group "The Sandlot"; you should see my entry, Bluff City Bombers.
NFL preview:
No one is ever right about these things, so I'll spare you the deep analysis and just name teams.
NFC: East—Dallas; North—Minnesota; South—Tampa Bay; West—Arizona; Wild Cards—NY Giants and Philadelphia
AFC: East—New England; North—Pittsburgh; South—Indianapolis; West—San Diego; Wild Cards—Jacksonville and NY Jets
NFC Championship: Dallas over Tampa Bay
AFC Championship: Pittsburgh over New England
Superbowl: Pittsburgh over Dallas
You're welcome.
http://games.espn.go.com/pigskin/frontpage
After you create the entry, join the group "The Sandlot"; you should see my entry, Bluff City Bombers.
NFL preview:
No one is ever right about these things, so I'll spare you the deep analysis and just name teams.
NFC: East—Dallas; North—Minnesota; South—Tampa Bay; West—Arizona; Wild Cards—NY Giants and Philadelphia
AFC: East—New England; North—Pittsburgh; South—Indianapolis; West—San Diego; Wild Cards—Jacksonville and NY Jets
NFC Championship: Dallas over Tampa Bay
AFC Championship: Pittsburgh over New England
Superbowl: Pittsburgh over Dallas
You're welcome.
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Eye of the Tiger? Uhh...not quite yet.
I wasn't able to post at my promised weekend time because I was:
a) on vacation out of town
b) practicing with my band
c) watching movies with my kids
d) locked in the bathroom, head still in the toilet, in the aftermath of MU's Saturday night's "win" over Illinois.
It's a trick question. I did all those things this weekend. Those who have chosen to drink the MU Kool-Aid about winning the Big 12 and competing for a national championship only have to look at the teams ahead of us in the national polls. USC, Ohio State and Oklahoma all destroyed their competition in the opening week. Missouri? A gut-wrenching, nail-biting, cover-your-eyes almost awful collapse against obviously inferior competition.
Sure, the Mizzou offense put up 52 points. Guess what? It should have been at least 72 points. They had more three-and-outs in the second half than a quarter of St. Louis Rams possessions. The play calling was stupid and unimaginative. My nine-year-old son could have called better plays than that. They ran when they should have passed, passed when they should have run, and were totally predictable when it came to converting big third down plays.
I don't even want to write about the defense at the risk of making myself sick again. Where in the world was the secondary? Didn't someone remind Pinkel to recruit cornerbacks? The guy playing left corner looked like ME! That is, 40 years old, 255 pounds, creaky knees and SLOW! The Illinois receiver who caught all those second half TDs and gained about six miles in receiving yardage was a converted defensive back who had never caught a pass in a game until Mizzou's defense turned him into the second coming of Jerry Rice.
Good teams win, but great teams in college put their feet on the throat of their opponent and press down until all signs of life are gone. Missouri was up by 25 points late in the third quarter, but they let their feet up and acted like the game was already over. They didn't drop in most polls, but they didn't move up, either.
They have their home opener this weekend against tiny little Southeast Missouri State. Anything other than 77 to nothing isn't going to impress me at all. Maybe Mizzou still remembers what it was like to be on the losing end of a beatdown, but in the Darwinist world of college football, the winners are the merciless predators, not the cute and fuzzy stuffed animals.
a) on vacation out of town
b) practicing with my band
c) watching movies with my kids
d) locked in the bathroom, head still in the toilet, in the aftermath of MU's Saturday night's "win" over Illinois.
It's a trick question. I did all those things this weekend. Those who have chosen to drink the MU Kool-Aid about winning the Big 12 and competing for a national championship only have to look at the teams ahead of us in the national polls. USC, Ohio State and Oklahoma all destroyed their competition in the opening week. Missouri? A gut-wrenching, nail-biting, cover-your-eyes almost awful collapse against obviously inferior competition.
Sure, the Mizzou offense put up 52 points. Guess what? It should have been at least 72 points. They had more three-and-outs in the second half than a quarter of St. Louis Rams possessions. The play calling was stupid and unimaginative. My nine-year-old son could have called better plays than that. They ran when they should have passed, passed when they should have run, and were totally predictable when it came to converting big third down plays.
I don't even want to write about the defense at the risk of making myself sick again. Where in the world was the secondary? Didn't someone remind Pinkel to recruit cornerbacks? The guy playing left corner looked like ME! That is, 40 years old, 255 pounds, creaky knees and SLOW! The Illinois receiver who caught all those second half TDs and gained about six miles in receiving yardage was a converted defensive back who had never caught a pass in a game until Mizzou's defense turned him into the second coming of Jerry Rice.
Good teams win, but great teams in college put their feet on the throat of their opponent and press down until all signs of life are gone. Missouri was up by 25 points late in the third quarter, but they let their feet up and acted like the game was already over. They didn't drop in most polls, but they didn't move up, either.
They have their home opener this weekend against tiny little Southeast Missouri State. Anything other than 77 to nothing isn't going to impress me at all. Maybe Mizzou still remembers what it was like to be on the losing end of a beatdown, but in the Darwinist world of college football, the winners are the merciless predators, not the cute and fuzzy stuffed animals.
Friday, August 29, 2008
That's why we call him "El Hombre"
If the Milwaukee Brewers don't make the NL playoffs this year--especially if they are caught and passed by the Cardinals--they will almost certainly look back at Wednesday night's game with angst and regret. Just as Jim Croce warned us about tugging on Superman's cape and spitting into the wind, you just don't mess around with El Hombre.
Brewers reliever Carlos Villanueva was certainly pumped up after putting what was, for all intents and purposes, the last nail in the coffin of the Cardinals' season. There was only one problem. Instead of merely celebrating, he decided to point to the Cardinal dugout. I can certainly understand why he would feel this way; the Brewers were about the knock out the division's perrenial champion, the team that had for so long stood in their way.
The problem was, El Hombre didn't take it that way. Albert Pujols charged out onto the field and called Villenueva out in front of his teammates, the home crowd and Cardinal nation. Literally dangling on the precipice of elimination, the Cardinals pulled another escape worthy of the Road Runner.
Now the hard work begins. The Cards still have 3-1/2 games to make up and no margin for error. But as I said in a previous post, there's just no argument for anyone else to be NL MVP other than "El Hombre": Albert Pujols.
Brewers reliever Carlos Villanueva was certainly pumped up after putting what was, for all intents and purposes, the last nail in the coffin of the Cardinals' season. There was only one problem. Instead of merely celebrating, he decided to point to the Cardinal dugout. I can certainly understand why he would feel this way; the Brewers were about the knock out the division's perrenial champion, the team that had for so long stood in their way.
The problem was, El Hombre didn't take it that way. Albert Pujols charged out onto the field and called Villenueva out in front of his teammates, the home crowd and Cardinal nation. Literally dangling on the precipice of elimination, the Cardinals pulled another escape worthy of the Road Runner.
Now the hard work begins. The Cards still have 3-1/2 games to make up and no margin for error. But as I said in a previous post, there's just no argument for anyone else to be NL MVP other than "El Hombre": Albert Pujols.
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