Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Top Ten Reasons the Cardinals Got Swept by the Cubs

10. Team was confused--thought they were playing the Chicago White Sox again.

9. Running away with the NL Central Division title the past few years just got boring.

8. Albert Pujols feigning injury and slump to conceal his superhuman identity, ala "Clark Kent."

7. George W. Bush's "loser stink" rubbed off on close friend and Cards owner Bill DeWitt.

6. Not paying attention to game--watching "Blade" marathon on Spike TV in dugout.

5. LaRussa wanted to spare Izzy the mental anguish of four blown saves.

4. So Taguchi took team out for tainted sushi at Benihana.

3. The Curse of Ernie Broglio.

2. Pitchers blew out arms trying to win "super-size prize" at the baseball toss game at Six Flags Great America.

1. Tony LaRussa rehearsing for annual post-season choke and collapse.


TUCK! said...

Dude, you forgot #11...

11) Relishing the prospect of crushing the Reds' fragile psyches by first giving them false hope that the Central can be won. (I mean, come on..."Rheal Cormier"???)

Switchtie said...

12) The Cardinals are trying to become a 40 man team of loser pitchers.